Singularities
by Austin.Imaginativ3
Summary: In the sleepy town of Gravity Falls, Bill Cipher has been defeated, but the mysteries surrounding the town are far from over. Four years later, and once again Dipper and Mabel Pines have returned to Gravity Falls after a three year absence. With both their Grunkle's returning, and new foes rising, will they even survive the Summer? And what's up with the strange Mist?
1. Mislead

**_Edit to Add: Obviously do not own Gravity Falls_**

* * *

 _Gravity Falls, Oregon_  
 _Summer 2016_

The run down _Speedy Beaver_ bus approached the edge of the sleepy town nestled between MT. Hood and the rest of Oregon, before slowing don to a screeching stop and letting off the newest group of tourists into the town. The buses sign flipped from Gravity Falls to Los Angles, as it departed from the city bus depot. The town had gone through some changes these past four years, and so had its inhabitants. After Weirdmageddon, and the events surrounding Bill Cipher, the city found itself moving forward into the future under Tyler Cutebiker's mayoral run. With help from the towns citizens, the local journeymen and current Man of Mystery, Soos Ramirez and his assistant Melody, tourism and economic trade has boomed. Now with the yearly return of the 'Mystery Twins', the Summer could really begin for Gravity Falls.

Mason 'Dipper' Pines, and his sparkly twin Mabel, stood in Gravity Fall's main square after walking from the bus stop into town. Heading towards the Mystery Shack, the twins passed the familiar faces of the town's resident's, even passing by Greasy's and waving inside to their favorite waitress. Rounding the corner, Mabel squeals upon seeing a familiar animal eating out of the garbage can. ' _Bah_!' Gompers beats out, as Mabel suddenly squeezes the goats neck, causing the goat to try and wriggle out of the death grip, " _MEHHHHH!_ " The sweater clad teen released the shaken goat, and Dipper shook his head at his sister's antics, hugging Soos' goat. The animal had become a bit of a town pet around the city, with everyone watching over the goat's whereabouts when it wandered into town. It was the unofficial mascot of the Mystery Shack, next to Waddles, after all.

"Gompers, lead us to the Mystery Shack, oh wise and strong protector of the forest!" Mabel points and commands the goat, "I will not feel safe from those wickedly, desperate gnomes without your ever watchful protection!" The Goat bleats, before moving off of his snack and into the forest.

"Mabel, don't you think commanding a goat to find the Mystery Shack, when it spends more time away from it then at it, is a bit much?" Dipper asks, "He always finds his way back, and now that we're taller, you could just as easily kick Jeff's butt for trying to propose to you again..." His twin stuck out her tongue at him, before adjusting her shoulder bag and marching on behind the Goat, into the depths of the forest. Dipper merely groans, as he adjusts his own backpack and his familiar trucker hat, before going for his flashlight and a chime. He had learned to keep a noisy object on him, when he wasn't searching for the unnatural or the odd, to keep the Wolves, Mountain Lions, and regular Bears from coming near him. He did manage to take his shrinking crystal and its harness out of its pocket, attaching it to the flashlight as he followed Mabel into the woods. A goat was a very tempting and easy target for the local predators.

Catching sight of Mabel and Gompers not to far away, Dipper quickly walks through the trees and sees Mable's brown locks disappear into a grove of tightly wound trees. He knew if Gompers had lead her that way, the goat was really lost, as that path led to the darker parts of the forest. Quickly running to catch up to her, he squeezes through the branches, and into the deeper parts of the forest. Sliding the crystal away from face of the flashlight, he turns the shines the regular light into the darkness. As he looks around the clearing, he finds himself in unfamiliar territory, as he chose to stay out of the darker and deeper parts of the forest, due to the monsters and horrors that lurked in the darker parts of the...

"Boo!" Mabel calls out, popping out in front of him as she does so. Dipper jumps out of his skin as she does so, and he falls backwards and onto his butt, a not at all girlish scream coming from his mouth as he falls for her trick. "Gotcha'!" Mabel calls out, smiling in the darkness, offering her hand to her twin as she moves toward him, "Gompers wandered off in here somewhere, and I knew you'd follow with a flashlight; we're going to have to find him before he becomes Gremoblin food!" Dipper wipes off the soil and the moss that he had fallen into, before going for his discarded flashlight on the forest floor. As he brings it up, his eyes follow the trail of light, and he spies an object that causes him to freeze in place.

" _Bill..._ " he utters shocked beyond words, and Mabel likewise looks to the sight before her, "He's still here, even after all this time." The memory was hazy, but he knew he had stumbled upon this statue once before, though whatever vague memories of what happened afterwards and waking up with a headache he attributed at the time to Mabel-juice, Dipper recognized standing before this statue once before. He even had his hand out, prepared to make one of his twisted deals even after his death, or imprisonment, or whatever it was that they had caused the two dimensional being. It was strange to think that the omniscient, dream-demon had been reduced to a two dimensional, statuesque version of himself.

"Dipper..." Mabel states, as she watches her brother move closer to the statue, looking behind and around it, before walking towards her again, "Is it really him?" Dipper looks into his sister's frightened eyes, before nodding and taking her hand.

"Let's go Mabel, we need to find Gompers and get home..." he states, "Soos was expecting us an hour ago by now, if he didn't already call a search party out for us with Melody and Wendy and the rest of the gang..." Mabel nods, looking over her shoulder as they walk out of the darkened forest and back into the light. A stiff breeze blows through the skeletal trees, and eerie lights begin to appear in the darkness, dancing on the breezing before settling around the Cipher statue, and blowing away like dandelion fluff in the wind. A child's giggling is heard on the breeze, as the multicolored orbs of light begin to float out of the deeper parts and into the forest at large.

 _The Mystery Shack_

By the time the Mystery Twins had found their missing Goat, which had somehow made it to the shack before them, Dipper and Mabel learned that Soos hadn't in fact, sent search parties out for them, though he had informed Melody to keep an eye out for their approach. Their summer rooms, even with Soos and Melody both living there, had remained untouched since their last return to Gravity falls over three years ago, and now the two would be sharing rooms again with their Grunkle's returning to Gravity Falls. After docking the _Stan-O-War II_ in Newport Bay or Astoria, one of the two beach cities, they would then join up with them in the ship or some other accommodation, a hotel no doubt. Until then the two would be sleeping above the Mystery Shack, like old times, though the beds were a bit more cramped then either twin cared to admit.

"Dipper, do you think Bill's going to return?" Mabel asks, returning to her bed after changing into her night clothes, "We looked for that statue before... but I can't remember if we ever found it." Dipper turns onto his side from his place on his bed, looking over at Mabel, his legs sprawled over the bed frame.

"I don't think so Mabel, he would have tried something already, no doubt," Dipper replies, "I know that's not much comfort, but if Bill had the power, he would have enacted his revenge on us already." He sees Mabel nod, digging a bit deeper into her pillow, before he too tries to get comfortable in his old bed.

He closes his eyes for a few minutes, trying to get some sleep, but thoughts of triangles, monsters, and madmen plague his dreams and turn them into nightmares. When he awakes in a cold sweat, he nearly screams out in terror, but finds his voice lost. Looking over to Mabel, he notices she dreams peacefully, though it may be because Waddles was currently sleeping next to her, her arm draped over the aging pig. Dipper nearly smiles, having missed the animal like one of his old friends. Then a wisp of light floats into his field of view, outside their window. Dipper turns, to see an orb of light dancing on the wind, crossing their window every few minutes. Dipper goes for Journal Three, only to remember that the journal had been tossed into the bottomless pit years ago, never to return.

Still, undeterred, Dipper made the decision to grab his nearest flashlight and a pad of paper. He had gone over every thing in the journals when they were all in his possession, and he remembered that Ford hadn't come across anything quite like this in his stay in Gravity Falls. Dipper wanted to write what was happening down, because creature attacks and sightings were slowly starting to become less and less, as humans started to tour the town more and more. Journal's One, Two, and Three may have been no more, but Dipper's Journal was going to be the tool necessary to survive encounters with Gravity Fall's remaining weirdness. Stumbling as he put on his classic getup, in sizes a bit larger than what he wore years ago, Dipper put on his shoes and crept as fast as he could out of the Mystery Shack.

He saw the lights dancing on the breeze, tens, if not hundreds of them blowing about in the wind. Dipper truly wished he had a camera that could capture this sight, but he doubted that these ethereal lights could be caught by such a mundane tool. Considering half the things his Grunkle Ford had to do to get the pictures he took, simplicity was often the last thing Dipper would expect facing this newest mystery. He noticed the bitter cold night air was starting to hit him, even though it was summer, the hills of the northwest were prone to extreme drops in temperature without the warmth of the sun. Dancing on his feet underneath the rainbow of lights, Dipper watched them for what could have been hours as a slight fog rolled in around him, causing the 'Faerie Lights' to shine brighter while illuminating the new backdrop with hues of various colors.

By the time Dipper realizes the 'Faerie Lights' were forming a pattern, a pathway into the forest beyond the Mystery Shack, he had already been entranced by the phenomena and had begun to follow them. He watches them float around in the sky, tethered by some unseen force into the pathway in the sky, Dipper follows them through bushes and streams, as he stumbles over branches and exposed roots. Finally he passes through one last bush, where the lights seem to thin and taper off, and he comes upon a magnificent sight. He pauses at the edge of the bush, not yet pushing into the clearing, as the last bits of rationality seem to come to the forefront of his mind, his self preservation kicking in at last.

He spies an empty clearing, at first, before he takes notice of the Faerie Lights, all fifty of them in pulsating hues and dancing around a new figure. Dipper doesn't quite know what he is seeing, if this is some kind of Pixie, Faerie, or Changeling, he doesn't quite recognize the woman in front of him from any of the journals. Dipper begins to take notes in his journal, to describe the woman in front of her.

Woman of pale skin, youthful and full of life at first glance.

Pale blonde with red streaks, possibly strawberry blonde hair that's just being thrown off by the lighting.

Wearing some form of dress, or toga, the material seems to be a mix of various flowers and plants found around Oregon, both native and not, such as western bleeding heart, foxglove, and various ferns and barks blended/layered/sown together into a seamless looking dress that flows to her ankles and drapes backwards.

Seems to be able to touch/move the 'Lights', though does not seem to be creating them.

Her voice is childlike, from the giggling I am hearing, though this could be deceptive to her true nature.

She appears to be floating amongst fifty of the lights, all in various shades and hues of the rainbow, which seem to be dancing like ripples in a pond.

Dipper puts his pencil back into his pocket, and shifts on the balls of his feet to move from the crouching position he had instinctively taken. Looking up from his journal, Dipper receives the shock of his life, as he finds himself letting go of what is in his hands and falling hard onto his butt. The curious-eyed spirit had snuck up on him, staring at him with large eyes and a healthy coating of freckles that dusted across her nose and face. She giggled again, seeing Dipper fall the way he had, her hair defying gravity and floating in the breeze as she slightly parts the bushes and moves towards dipper.

He doesn't know quite what to do, grabbing for a stick or rock to defend himself with, in case she proved to be hostile. "Stay back!" he shouts out loud, as she ignores him and moves closer, "I'm warning you, I- I know seven forms of karate, and I took to elective class featuring self-defense- and I only got a C minus both times!" Grasping a hefty stick in his hands, he goes to put it in front of him, to keep the woman from coming closer to him. She looks at it, her joyous expression turning to one of puzzlement, before ghosting through the offending object, which causes Dipper to drop his stick in shock. He then hears the woman giggle again, grabbing his wrists from the bottom, and suddenly dragging him backwards through the bush. He doesn't even have time to scream, closing his eyes and starting to get nauseous from fear, he then cracks a peek.

He almost regrets it, as the nauseous feeling increases at the revelation that the girl was effortlessly carrying him through the air, like the effects of gravity were nullified. He feels the lights brush around him, as the woman makes babbling sounds of contentment and unintelligible gibberish that sounds a lot like Latin. He sees her eyes are closed, and her smile wide, as she dances with Dipper in the night sky. He doesn't know exactly where he ended up, but he looks down and sees nothing but yawning darkness underneath the Faerie's lights, not even the ground was able to be seen in this fog. Suddenly he feels the woman decelerate in her pace, though he sees her smile continue to beam in the darkness and the lights. Suddenly he notices all the lights seem to be pulsing, slowing down as they do so, and beginning to form a swirling pattern down towards the ground.

"Wait, no, please!" he states, as he recognizes the form of a sink, and he finds that the woman's smile isn't stopping, nor does she seem to be listening to him, "Please set me down gently, I can't tell how far we're up, and I really don't want to suffer any broken boooooness-" He feels the woman let go of his hands, as he begins to fall, impossibly slowly as he does so. He doesn't even stop when he knows he should be hitting the ground, but it seemed like the Faerie Lights were impossibly stretching down with him, as he was falling into the darkness, until one by one they began to fall away like shooting stars burning out.

It was there Dipper began to realize he had been lured to the bottomless pit by that ethereal beauty. He wondered why he even felt safe in the woman's presence, he questions why he was lulled into a false sense of security, only to be dropped into a bottomless pit. Perhaps the woman knew he wasn't going to be harmed when she let go, or perhaps she wanted him out of the way. maybe she had just played away her anger at being discovered in her private and isolated dace, in the middle of the night, and chose to play a mean trick on him in return. Maybe there was something else going on.

All he really knew was that he was falling, and as he fell, he realized he was catching up to something else lost in the darkness. He squinted hard, regretting having lost both his journal and his flashlight when he had been scared, he tried to make the approaching object out. His eyes widened, as he reached out and tried to move to intercept the out of place object, and found his hand grasping a golden doorknob. Dipper wondered why there was a Red Door in the Bottomless Pit. He went to turn the knob and found it unlocked. He pushed open the door and it separated from it's frame. He stepped inside.


	2. Reverse the Flow, Axolotl!

**_A/N: I apologize for the First Person PoV. Normally I chose not to write in that PoV, but due to the nature of the First Episode, it kinda turned out better in my head writing it in that PoV..._**

 ** _If you enjoy it, leave a review as it sparks my creativity!_**

 _Somewhere_

Dipper walked through the doorway, and found himself in a milky expanse of newborn stars. He turns around back towards the doorway, only to find it gone. "It will do that, you know," an echoing voice states, "It likes to bring visitors to me, though I remember meeting you before, Dipper Pines, so I'm afraid I cannot answer any questions…" Dipper turns around once more, to find himself nearly face to face with a massive Axolotl, which was twice as tall as he was and three times as large. He then realized just how twisted his sense of size had become, realizing the massive creature easily took up most of the viewable space he could see. "Falling for a couple of hours in a massive void would cause anyone sensory distress, Dipper Pines," the massive creature speaks, "But my listening to your wandering thoughts is not the reason you are here…"

Dipper feels something float behind him, colliding with his posterior, and nearly causing him to tumble backwards, until he realized he was sitting on one of the most comfortable beanbags he had ever felt. "Who are you?" Dipper asks, "How do you know me?" Though he doesn't see the Axolotl move its face, he gets the felling that it was grinning and trying to hold back laughter.

"I apologize, I forget with your understanding of the universe in relation to the space/time continuum, that you do not always remember meeting me before..." the Axolotl then blinks, and windows into other worlds, other times, open up before Dipper's very eyes, surrounding him and circling him like a million different television screens going off at once, "This, Dipper Pines, is your manifestation of your reality, as I see it; as an observer outside your space/time continuum I am allowed to visit any time and place of my choosing from the safety of the outside, including its variations." Dipper blinks looking over the various screens, some showing familiar scenes played over and over again, with subtle variations like Soos being a werewolf, or Gideon replacing Mabel, or even one where he saw a variation of Wendy that was his age talking to a teenage Dipper at the end of summer.

"I am the guardian of realities and second chances, I protect the balance and the flow of the events happening in Gravity Falls, as they occur throughout the Multiverse; including watching over Bill and his various, well, variations," the milky white salamander states, "You Dipper Pines, are just one of my various subjects besides Bill, that I watch over due to your relation to the Zodiac and Gravity Falls, among the others like Ford, Mabel, Wendy, and even Pacifica..." Dipper watches as one of the windows stops in front of him, enlarging to show the first day of summer. It was here that Dippers eyes widen, as he sees who is in the Golf Cart.

* * *

 _Ah, Summer Break._  
 _A time for relaxation, spas, swimming, and leisure._

The Sun shines brightly in the sky, as the scene shifts to reveal a friendly picnic, a man flipping burgers at a red barbecue, while children laugh and play, leaving their parents and their friends to gossip about their vacation plans.

 _Unless you are me._

The scene pans over to a large wooden billboard, as screaming suddenly begins to raise in pitch. A Golf Cart emblazoned with the with a red question mark suddenly crashes through a billboard, which read: Welcome to Gravity Falls! Two kids, a chubby, short, blonde haired kid in a set of cargo shorts, a t-shirt, and a gilet, and a long haired, platinum blonde girl in sneakers, skinny jeans, a white t-shirt, and a neon, 90s windbreaker, go careening through the billboard and off a cliff and roughly land onto a new pathway. As they drive the golf cart speedily through the darkening woods, the boy looks back from his seat on the passengers side.

"They're uh still coming!" he states in a southern drawl, turning back to the girl who was driving, "It's gettin' closer!" She barely reacts to the boys comments, intent and focus on driving through the forest and not crashing. An enormous shadow suddenly begins to go over the cart, and massive hands reach down to grasp the back of the golf cart. She's driving like a maniac though, and hits a patch of rocks that cause the cart to bump out of the giant pursuer's reach.

 _My name is Pacifica Northwest, the boy about to puke is my new best friend, Gideon Gleeful. You might be wondering why we're running for our lives in a golf cart, from a creature of unimaginable horror?_

Suddenly the monstrous creature picks up one of the trees, ripping its roots out of the ground, and hurling the massive trunk over the golf cart. "Look out!" screams Gideon, as Pacifica swerves to avoid the massive, fallen tree. They both scream as they nearly topple over the cart with the turn.

 _Let me assure you, there's quite a story behind it. But let's start at the beginning..._

It all began when my parent's found out about the will. My father was a Northwest, and so was I, and we were born with silver spoons in our mouths, and the world at our fingertips. At least all the Northwest's, except my Father. Preston Northwest was born to Auldman Northwest and one of his may ex-wives, who had been bought up and abandoned like the trophy's my Father had once cherished, but he left to tarnish and rust, all for the love of my Mother. Not agreeing with wanting to go into the family business of selling Mud Flaps to the entire west coast of the North American continent and Canada, Preston Northwest was changed from a selfish snob, into a generous and forward thinking individual.

Priscilla Northwest had done my Father a lot of good, having suggested they leave Oregon and Auldman Northwest's reach, for the sunny skies and all around progressive California. That was how my family moved to the house I grew up in, my home in Piedmont, California. By no means were we poor, even with my Father being cut off from a steady flow of monetary gain, he had quite a bit of untouchable savings tucked away, which made finding a job just right for his college training and outlook quite easy, since he could afford to wait. With the money he took in as a Manager of a successful business chain, he quickly rose up to the notice of many higher ups, who took note of his family name especially, which opened up more doors than my embittered Grandfather could close. So, I, Pacifica Northwest, grew up in a well-to-do family, my Father and Mother making sure not to spoil me, unless they accidentally repeat the mistakes his father, and many more Northwest's, made before with their children.

Growing up in highly monitored luxury, I found myself enrolled in one of the best and most prestigious preparatory schools my Father could afford on his salary. This was both to groom me to inherit my Father's business practice and the family business, as while Aulcrud Northwest had kicked out his only Son and child from his will, knowing that I existed left him with another possible heir, free of the disappointment of his Son. So my life became a precarious balance of who I was supposed to be, and who I really was on the inside. To say it was tough to act like the rich girl I was, in front of girls who often thought they were better than everyone else, when I wanted to act like a normal girl who loved to talk about boys and fashion trends, rather than stocks and company buyouts. I had the added pressure of my Father expecting me to become successful and be better than he was, and my Mother who wanted me to just be myself and be happy.

 _Is it sad that I was happy to learn that my Grandfather died?_

I felt like I had no more restrictions placed upon me, without my Grandfather having to check on my grades and status in school, as well as checking out my national ranking in my favorite pass time, mini-golf. It was a venue my Grandfather encouraged me to build success off of, even though I really just played for fun, as both my Father and my Mother encouraged me to do my best. To my surprise, the funeral service was going to be held in Oregon, in a sleepy little town called Gravity Falls, though they knew we would be unable to attend it in time, there was stipulation to attend the reading of the will in that same town, or else we risk letting the Northwest assets being dissolved among the company board of directors.

So, I found myself waiting in an airport lobby, waiting with my carry-on's as my Father and Mother tried to decipher just which gate we needed to be at by ten o'clock. I absently picked at my braces, which were scheduled to becoming off soon another stipulation by my Grandfather,who wanted 'only the best' for his granddaughter. I had never met the man, but I was saddened that he only cared about reputation and appearances, rather than his own family. As I was sitting on my luggage, a fat man in a silvery suit suddenly stumbled, right in front of me, causing me to fall backwards and onto the ground hard. Shaking the confusion off of me, I looked up, to be met with a worried look and goggled eyes, the man obviously uncomfortable and visibly nervous, profusely sweating as he stood staring down at me.

"P-pacifica N-northwet, oh, oh gee, I didn't m-mean to knock you down- oh," he moane, as he wrung his hands, "I need to w-warn you though- geez, why is this so-so hard..." He began to mumble to himself, as he moved to fiddle with a tape measure on his belt, as he looked around to see if anyone was observing them. "Pacifica Northwest, if you want to survive through the summer, don't go to Gravity Falls!" he says, turning back to face me directly, "Whatever you do, don't trust them, don't trust anyone-" He suddenly frowns, looking at the time on a big digital clock on the wall. "I-I-I have to go, I've stayed too long... they can track me; they probably already know I was here..." he states, looking my way again, "He lied to me... she lied to me too; don't trust anyone, not even yourself!" Suddenly he steps backwards away, and into a passing crowd of strangers. Before I can even move to ask how he knew me, he was already gone, like magic. I step forward, hearing a crack and looking down at something I hadn't noticed there before the stranger bumped into me. It was a pretty, aquamarine stone, set in a bolo tie clip. It was a pity it was cracked, though I still pocketed it for some later spark of creativity.

* * *

By the time we landed in Oregon, made it to Gravity Falls via Bus, and found our way to the Sheriff's office to meet with the Lawyer, we were all tired and wanting to get this over with. "Well, welcome everyone, my name is Tad, Tad Strange, and I'll be the one processing all the, legalities, surrounding Auldman Northwest's familial inheritance," the lawyer states, "Now, with Sheriff Powers as our witness, I can begin the reading of the will." We look to the gruff, mustachioed Sheriff who merely growled back at us, before we quickly return our attention to Tad.

"Ahem: To my Son, Preston, I leave the position of President and Chairman of Northwest Mud flaps, and the entirety of the Northwest Manor," he says in a monotone voice, "To Priscilla, the woman I once thought a witch, whom I believed had poisoned my Sons business-minded fanaticism, I leave half the Northwest monetary funds." He coughs, taking a sip of water, before resuming his droll monotone. "The rest is to be distributed to both Preston, in the form of Northwest Mud flaps, and a large summed trust fund to my granddaughter Pacifica, to be made accessible upon her eighteenth birthday," Tad Strange continues, "While I do not expect this to buy your forgiveness, I humbly ask for it by awarding you the things that are due to you, both to you, Preston, by birth, and your Wife via marriage into the most elite of families." I looked in shock at my parent's faces, both as surprised as I was to hear my Grandfather leave us money and the Northwest Manor, having come in expecting to be completely stricken from the will.

"I, erhm, thank you, Mister Strange, for telling us all of this," my Father responded, clearly apprehensive about all of this, "Were there... any catches to this?" Tad's eyebrows raise, before he looks at the will outlined before him, before returning his gaze to my father.

"Actually, there were a few outlines that he expected to be upheld, through this Summer, at least, some regarding Founder's Day and Northwest Fest, but as for specifics..." Tad Strange states to my father, looking back and forth from the papers in front of him, "You, Preston and Priscilla, are to stay until the end of Summer, whereupon the start of the Fall Semester of the Piedmont Girls Preparatory School, Pacifica may be allowed to choose for herself whether to leave Gravity Falls and her inheritance behind her, or to stay and cement your family's return to the lives of the social elite." Tad then pulls out a key from around his neck, and bends over to reach a locked desk drawer. "Auldman also requested I personally give this to Pacifica Northwest, and I shall deliver it now," Tad states, pulling out an ornate, silver hand mirror, with intricate carvings I noticed were engraved into the metal, "If she wishes to stay a part of the social elite, she will break that mirror at the end of the Summer, otherwise upon her return to Piedmont and her average life, it would serve as a reminder of everything she chose to give up, both to her family and herself."

I was actually in shock at that, knowing I was forced between a rock and a hard place. It seemed I was now a lynchpin in a summers long scheme to return the Northwest name to its proper place. All I wanted was a nice summer vacation on the beaches off Piedmont, and now I had to stay in this weird, backwards town. I already knew my summer was off to a great start.

* * *

Upon leaving Tad Strange's offices with a comprehensive list of all we were expected to do over the course of the Summer, I made up my mind about this town and its residence. I saw too many Billboards about some Tent of Telepathy and its Twin hosts, and a lot wooden signs pointing to a tourist trap out in the woods, named the Mystery Shack. It also said they were hiring. While there wasn't much shopping to do, until I found the local mall that is, I knew that I needed to learn more about this mysterious, out of the way town. My first stop appeared to be the not as advertised, gimmicky sounding, Mystery Shack.

First came the movers. Apparently Auldman Northwest was a shrewd man, not only forcing his children and only grandchild into staying in Gravity Falls to restore their name, but also managing to find people willing to break into our old house and move all of our belongings into the Northwest Manor. Speaking of the Manor, it was a grotesquely, huge building high above Gravity Halls, locked behind large iron gates, and built with more rooms than a person could ever need to house twelve families. Still, it was our new home, and my Parents took to renovating it like others before. Did I forget to mention my Mother was a Real Estate woman? It helped when she decided she needed to bring the Manor out of the eighteenth century, and they set to work getting servants and other hired help into getting plans drawn up. It was going to be a while before the Manor would be livable by my standards, with all the noise and construction going on in the large, echoing mansion.

"You want to what?" my parents had said, upon hearing my decision, looking at each other in concern. I had calmly explained to them, as they unpacked fine china from dusty boxes, and wiped down long, oak tables in the Manor.

"Sweetie, you know not many people are willing to hire a twelve year old?" Priscilla Northwest states a gently as she could to me, "At least, not a paying job…" The blonde nods, knowing that was more than likely a possibility.

"Even if it's a summer internship, I'd take anything to get out of this house while it's being worked on," Pacifica states, "I can't focus when the workers are pounding on the walls, and I can't stay here all the time helping you fix up this broken old mansion without sacrificing my social life." I bite my tongue a little at that bout of sass, expecting my father to be angered that I disrespected my grandfathers house, but I was surprised to see him sadly smiling at me.

"You're quite right Pacifica, I shouldn't expect you to stay here all the time, wasting your summer here, locked away behind these stuffy gates and walls," Preston states, "It's bad enough my Father had the gall to force us to stay here, but to also make you choose between your social life back home, and the family fortune…" Preston sighs, as Priscilla moves over to rub his back, concern clearly on her face.

"I believe what your father wishes for you, is for you to go make some friends in Gravity Falls," Priscilla Northwest continues, brightening up and focusing on me, "If you do choose to stay here, if you want to inherit the family fortune and this manor, you'd best make your life enjoyable by making some friends here, the summer only lasts so long after all." I smile at my family, happy that they would let me out of this stuffy castle, to spread my wings and let me grow. I was lucky to have such a great father and mother, and I didn't know what I would do without them.

* * *

Changing out of my old clothes, I decided to wear a white shirt, with skinny jeans, a nice pair of boots to wear in the mud, and my favorite, retro windbreaker. Deciding to put my hair into a ponytail, I grabbed the first thing I could find to keep my hair back, and tied it in a nice bow, flipping my hair back and smiling at myself in the mirror. Leaving the mansion, and convincing the Limo driver to take me to the Mystery Shack, after he tried convincing me to go anywhere else, I found myself in front of a ramshackle cabin that looked in need of a good overhaul. Outside it seemed to be worse for wear, but the inside seemed better kept and even lived in.

It was interesting when I first walked inside, seeing the oddities for the first time. The Sascrotch, the rock that looks like a face, the Fiji mermaid, even the the jar of floating eyeballs in the gift shop, all of it seemed like junk and fake attractions designed to entice guests into buying gift shop merchandise. I then came across a hillbilly wax statue which was holding a gun, as he smiled creepily while his lazy eyes looked two different directions, and it nearly caused me to shudder. I turned away from the figure, and found the register had a bell on its desk. Ringing it, I decided to see if someone was actually there in the store. Feeling like I was being watched, I decided to turn back to the wax figurine, only to find it gone. I looked around, then turned back to the register, only to scream out in fright.

I suddenly found myself staring down the barrel of shotgun, the wax hillbilly actually a real person. "We're closed, now git!" the crazy eyed hillbilly stated, "We're only open on the weekends, and we ain't making exceptions fer' no darn rich folk." I put my hands up, and took a small step backwards.

"I'm not here to cause trouble, I wanted to apply for a... job?" I state, as the man turns his left eye towards me, staring me straight on and making me want to flinch, "I saw the signs in the city..." The scary hillbilly lowered his weapon down behind the register, before walking oddly out from behind the register, sans gun.

"Fer the shop, or the appren-tease-ship?" the man asks, a bit calmer now, "Like I said tours and shop's only open on the weekends; scholarly is whats done gunna set you up fer room n' board..." I didn't know exactly what either job entailed, but I really didn't want to deal with the man's weapon anymore.

"Both?" I state, trying not to sound to afraid of the man's reaction. He merely began to stroke his beard in contemplation, a fairly neutral look on his face as he did so.

"Gideon!" the old man shouted into a hallway, "Get in here boy, we got company!" As I stood there waiting, the old man rummaged through shelves in the gift shop, until I heard someone coming in from another part of the house.

A smaller, slightly chubby boy in a baby blue hoodie and jeans, with messy white/blonde hair came through the hallway, a pink apron with the words 'Kiss the Widdle Genius' embroidered on the front. He had a little bit of a cross expression on his face, as he ignored me completely and focused on the older man. "What is it McGucket, you know my daddy asked me to make sure dinner got done..." he stopped as he laid his eyes on me, and began to look at McGucket and back, "W-w-what's a girl doing here McGucket, w-w-what if she's one uh _her's_?" The hillbilly finds a pair of broken, bottle rimmed glasses, and puts them on his face, turning back to myself and Gideon.

"She ain't, or else she would a flinched when I looked her over, you know that Pines girl can't stand looking into my lazy eye..." McGucket says, his crazy demeanor suddenly having shifted with the retrieval of the glasses, "She's here for the job, both of them, so make sure after you done finished dinner, (add a plate fer her by the way), get that spare bed dusted n'ready." He turned to me, after he finished addressing the boy. "This here is Gideon Gleeful, he'll be your partner n' the 'prenticeship, his Father Bud Gleeful, is the one who done owns the Mystery Shack, business wise o'course, whereas I own the land," McGucket states to me, "My name is Fiddleford McGucket, inventor of the strange and wacky, and joint proprietor of the Mystery Shack and all its secrets; though is Stanley has his way, that won't be much too soon..."

I'm about to ask him what he means, when the boy suddenly comes back in sans his apron, grabbing me by the arm and dragging me through the house. "Dinner'll be ready in an hour McGucket, I'll show her round the Shack and let her know the gist of what she just stepped into," he calls back towards the strange, older man, his blue eyes cold and steely towards me as he drags me along. He takes me into what appears to be a living room, where a giant T-Rex skull is sitting like a side table for the couch and an arm chair. "I don't know who you are, why you're dressed so fancy, but let me warn you now, child, Fiddleford is barely scrapping by, living off his old patents," Gideon Gleeful states, a shadow passing over his eyes as he begins to talk to me, "If'n you think McGucket is a secret millionaire, or whatever those Pines twins told you, I can tell you now we got more bills to pay than anything you could hope to be stealing..."

The short stack has the cutest little face as he pouts, and I just find it adorable he thinks he's intimidating me. "'sides, by the time Stanford Pines finishes buying out McGucket by the end of summer, you'd be out of whatever job you think you'd get..." the boy, Gideon states, "As much times as he's offered Fiddleford a blank check, you think the old coot would've sold out his half of the shack and spent it all on his inventions..." Suddenly a thought crosses my mind, and an idea starts to form in my head.

"How much?" I ask the kid, "In bills; how much does Fiddleford owe?" He looks up at me, confusion on his face as he gives me a look like I just grew a second head. "I just want to know..." I state, as I try to give my best puppy dog pout, the kid giving me a look of disgust as I say , " _Pwease?_ " He shudders, and I chuckle a bit at his discomfort.

"Fine, just promise me you'll never do that again..." I nod, as he continues to speak, "Roughly he owes about ten thousand in overdue bills, my pa could shell out the cash with his Car sales, but Fiddleford knows he's been wanting to sell out to Stanford Pines, ever since the telekinesis incident..." He shakes his head and stares right back at me. "Never mind that, why do you want to know?" he asks, and I give a smile, "What?" I merely take out my phone and call my mother.

Unbeknownst to either myself or Gideon, we were being watched. A shadow in the window suddenly shifts away, as three pairs of feet suddenly scuttle away and into the forests of Gravity Falls. "Queen, a queen!" one shadow mutters, as raspy voices chuckle and agree, "Find the king, tell the king!"

* * *

Shortly after Priscilla Northwest arrived with a written contract and a briefcase full of cash, Gideon Pines and Fiddleford McGucket were both in awe at their guardian angel. Gideon had even apologized for misjudging me, even giving me pick of a free item from the gift shop out of thanks. "With this money, we could open up the shop again, full time, hire a real cashier and actually start paying our handyman again..." he said in awe, staring at the briefcase in front of him as I picked through the boxes of miscellaneous back stock, "McGucket, we could get real food, instead of canned meat and bargain third-rate foods..." I settle for a grappling hook, somewhat out of novelty for the strange device, and look up to see McGucket and Gideon both tossing money into the air and enjoying the money rain.

"And, to think my parents actually approved of letting me stay here while the mansion's being worked on, I could help you with your... what kind of apprenticeship was it?" I ask, and both Gideon and McGucket turn to me, "What, you expect me to just pay the bills and not get involved in whatever work it is you're doing; why'd you think I had you sign a contract, now that I own half this building?" Gideon grumbles for a half a second, while McGucket removes his aht and holds it in front of him, a sheepish look crossing his face.

"Why, I done think you have it right, yes I do believe I owe you an explanation to what we're doing here..." McGucket states, pointing to Gideon and nodding, he then disappears up the stairs, "I'm continuing the research of an old colleague of mine, he actually owned this house before he disappeared, and since then I've been working day in and out to find out just what it was that happened to him." I open my eyes in shock, hearing this for the first time, as Gideon reappears with a wrapped and bound package, which McGucket takes and then opens, to reveal a leather bound book, blue cover, with a raised golden hand print on the top, six fingered and unusual, and marked with the number three in black ink. "This is one of three Journals my colleague wrote about, over thirty odd years back; lil' Gideon here found it a few weeks back, after hanging up those help wanted signs in town and the woods," McGucket states, "Ever since then, I've been having him research the strange and unusual goings on in this town, to try and get answers to why, and what, made my friend disappear..." I stared at the book in my hands, an eyepiece hanging from it as part of a bookmark, I flip open the first page and then leaf through the stiff pages.

"Gnomes?" I state, looking at the diagram, "Barf Faeries, Gremloblins, Ghosts?" I look through it all in wonder, and then look up at Gideon and McGucket, who have apprehensive looks on their faces. "When do we begin?" I asks, a smile on my face as I realize just what weirdness I may have stepped into, "It looks like this summer may not be such a bore, after all..."

* * *

 _Now, that's when we catch up to our story. What, were you expecting a full ten thousand word retelling of the play by play that got us into this mess? No? Well, I didn't want to write it all out anyway, so I'll summarize the events:_

Gideon wanted to take me around town in the Gold Cart, originally to go get some better supplies for the Mystery Shack, when I came face to face with one of the oddest creatures in Gravity Falls. "Shmebulock," the Gnome said, as it suddenly appeared on the hood of the cart, having come from out of the trees. I screamed and swerved, nearly hitting a tree as I drove, but managed to slam on my breaks and toss 'Shmebulock' off the hood and into the surrounding bushes.

"Whoah, whoah, whoa, whoa," another Gnome states, this time coming out of the buses with his hands up in a non-threatening manner, and a smile on his face, "Sorry about that, we all okay there?" I nod dumbly, as does Gideon, who managed not to spill the groceries. "Good, good, my name's Jeff, and that was Shmebulock, sorry about him he's a little..." the gnome circles his finger around his ear, "Anyway, we couldn't help but stalk- I mean, see you when you visited the Mystery Shack, and we became entranced by your beauty." Jeff walks over to stand in front of Gideon, though he has his eyes on myself. "I know this seems sudden, but we've been looking for someone of the right... persuasion, to help us out with a little matter," Jeff puts his hand behind his back, and gets down on one stubby, little knee, "Pacifica Northwest, will you do us the honor of marrying our Gnome King, and end the curse that has been put upon all of us?"

Quickly I begin to back up, and drive off, as Jeff begins shouting at us as I floor it. Gideon turns to me, his eyes open in surprise and he pauses. "That was quite mean spirited there, miss Northwest," Gideon states, "I mean, I know it was sudden, but that was quite rude to leave him like that, without even an answer!" I raise my eyebrow in response to Gleeful's chiding, when suddenly I feel like a few hundred eyes are upon us. I slow down a bit and look up, and notice beady eyes and the tiny form of Jeff staring at us from above.

"That was quite rude," Jeff states, looking down at us with a few dozen rabid gnomes surrounding us, "We were going to just give you a chance to say no, then we were going to kidnap you anyway, but after leaving me like that without even asking who we were trying to hook you up with?" Jeff snaps his little fingers, and the Gnomes begin to get restless. "He's actually quite compatible, at least I believe so, we don't interact with you human's very much especially not since our last King got disposed," Jeff states, "Get 'em boys!"

* * *

 _Now you're caught up, and oh, look, we've actually skipped a head a bit in our story..._

The crashed golf cart lay forgotten in front of the Mystery Shack, as the sun set behind the massive monster made of Gnomes ahead of myself and Gideon. "You should just come with us, Pacifica Northwest, and meet the guy!" Jeff states slightly cheerily from the top of the giant Gnome amalgamation, "He's a nice guy, just accept the ring, and we can take you to him!" I looked to Gideon, and saw the fear on his face, before realizing I felt the same as he did. I gulped and looked at Jeff, before sighing and mustering up all the courage I could.

"Alright Jeff, I'll do it," I state, as Gideon starts to protest, "Just...come down here and give me the ring..." The gnome perked up at that, before making his way down the gnome pile and squirming out of the foot and onto the grass.

"Thank you Pacifica, you really don't know how much it means to us, for you to make this noble sacrifice," Jeff states, pulling out a box holding a ring with an odd crystal jutting out from its center, on any other day it would have impressed me, "Now, will you take our King's hand in gnome-y- I mean, holy matrimony?" He slips the ring onto my finger, and I step back blushing, as my hands find a piece of heavy machinery I had been looking for.

"Just one thing, Jeff, before I go with you," I state, much to the Gnome's surprise, "Pucker up!" Suddenly I pull the leaf blower from underneath the pile of dry leaves, and rev it into reverse. Suddenly Jeff tries to run away, only to be sucked into the blower and lodged in their tightly. "Fore!" I call out, putting it into maximum power on its blowing setting. Suddenly the gnome is launched into the heart of the giant, monster gnome, causing Jeff to continue through and into the forest, and breaking apart the amalgamation. Their tiny screams were quite amusing, as they scrambled all back into the forest.

At that Gideon turns to me, and I smile as he rushes into giving me a massive hug. "I was so afraid you were going to be taken, how'd you know leaf blowers were their only weakness?" he asks, "Did you read it in that book?" He pulls out the book and shows the page with the gnomes, their weakness being blank.

"Nope, but let's fix that!" I state, writing 'leaf blowers' into the empty space, and then underneath writing 'Who is the Gnome King?' and underlining it twice, "I don't think that's the last time we'll be seeing them..." Gideon nods and we both head back into the Shack for the night. Tomorrow I had to plan out a whole new wardrobe to bring here. This place was my new home, at least temporarily.

* * *

Brushing his hair from his eyes, he neatly combed it into place, as he heard scurrying outside his room. Sighing, he walks over to the window, opening it up and looking outside. "What do you want, Jeffery?" he asks the pint sized gnome. He had to admit, the gnome looked worse for wear, dirt smudging his skin, and twigs running through his hat and clothes.

"We found her for you, my King!" the gnome states proudly, wringing his hands nervously, "She got away for now, but we know where she lives... you could marry her, and end the curse!" The boy in the window sighs, staring pityingly at the clueless gnome below him. "By ending the curse, we could get our King back from the wizard that stole him," Jeff continues, "You wouldn't have to be lonely anymore either, and I think she'd complement your stoicism."

"Not tonight Jeff, just leave me be, I have another show to put on," he states, "I have my sister anyway, so I'm not lonely like you keep insisting..." He sighs and begins to rub away the headache forming from this useless conversation. "Just... go, Jeff, I promise I'll help you look for your King tomorrow," the boy states, "Stop it with this 'Queen' nonsense, and get back to your people..." The gnome looks dejected, but nods and moves away from the house and the boy's window. He shuts the window, and closes the curtains, lighting the lamp that sits at his bedside. "Looks like they really miss you," he says to no one in particular, before removing his favorite baby blue suit jacket from the small, hand-like claws, "Too bad they're so useful..." As he closes his door, the light shines upon the half-hidden coat rack. Petrified in a soundless, frozen scream, the nearly blind Gnome King is unable to move, forevermore silent as Dipper Pines' favorite coat rack.

* * *

"What the heck did I just watch?" Dipper Pines asks,as he tries to scramble back away from the screen in front of his face. It felt like he had been there, in first person, while Pacifica Northwest narrated her own life story.

"That, was just one branch of the Multiverse, which is in danger as we speak, Dipper Pines," the Axolotl states, "In every reality there exists Bill Cipher, and in every reality Bill Cipher is locked and sealed away by you, Dipper Pines, or some variation of you, all but one..." The space salamander trails off, causing Dipper to look up in shock at what the celestial being is saying.

"Are you saying there's a Bill Cipher out on the loose in the multiverse?" Dipper asks, "Isn't he from an alternate dimension, wouldn't he have only existed in my dimension?" It feels like the Axolotl is smiling at Dipper, as if he had come across something that caught his attention.

"You are quite correct, there is only 'one' Bill Cipher, but due to his own two-dimensional existence, his travels into your third dimension opened his physical manifestation to new forms," the Axolotl states simply, "Having time and space, relatively height and width, he has been introduced to the concept of depth, or parallel timelines, literal dimensions filled with alternate Bill Cipher's." The Axolotl then moves the beanbag chair closer to his face, and Dipper finds his own reflection in the beady, black eyes of the aquatic salamander. "Bill Cipher has subverted time and space in one of the dimensions where his Weirdmeggedon succeeded, hiding his true power from even himself, and pretending to have been defeated,"he Axolotl states, "While I can return you to your dimension at anytime, your knowledge of this conversation being removed of course, the threat of Bill Cipher actually breaching the reality he is hiding in, and then laying siege to the whole multiverse, is an unacceptable outcome."

Dipper doesn't know what to say to the salamander, but he can only imagine the horrors that the cosmic Dream Demon could unleash, if he ever breached all of reality as he knew it. "Tell me, Dipper Pines, in your opinion, what defines a demon?" the Axolotl asks, then laughs to himself at Dipper's confused reaction, before pushing Dipper away and letting him gravitate to his original position, "Think about that, and in the meantime, will help me figure out just where our 'Rogue' Cipher is?" Dipper looks to the Axolotl, as the screens begin to blur and surround him once more.

"Help you catch Bill Cipher?" he sees all the screens where Bill Cipher still exists, tormenting his many alternates and terrorizing Gravity Falls at large, "Sure, since I'm between time, why not?" He feels like the Axolotl is smiling, as Dipper smiles even wider, cracking his knuckles. "Let's get to work," Dipper states, "Got any snacks?" The Axolotl blinks, and Dipper finds a plate of massive nachos in front of him. With chips and cheese in one hand, and the multiverse at the tips of his other hand, Dipper feels a rush of excitement. He doubted his Grunkle Ford ever did something like this.

 **Bill Note(B/N: Ha ha, I saw another Author do this, and I thought, why not just use the idea! Here's a message, just for you Pinetree!**

 **Cngz? Cngz'y ngvvktotm? Gs O... jkgj?**

 **Mfkbqobb, fp qexq vlr?**


	3. A Pair of Lake Monsters

**A/N: Obviously I do not own Gravity Falls. (Also its come to my attention that Bill has broken free of Time Baby, and has leaked backwards into this story, leaving two separate ciphers in last chapter's Bill Note...)**

"Okay, so what dimension are we going to see next?" Dipper asks from the comfort of the incredibly soft beanbag chair, "A universe where I'm super rich and rub it in Preston Northwest's face. Or a universe where Mabel's rational and can carry a conversation with me?" The Axolotl merely blinks, and Dipper knows the space salamander is holding back his laughter.

"While I don't doubt there are parallel realities within the course of reason, I believe I shall aim for something a bit more to your taste," the Axolotl states, "Perhaps a reality where the monsters are quite human, and humanity is quite... monstrous."

The screens begin to circle around Dipper, until one single screen that is completely white, stops in front of his eyes before fully encompassing his vision. As he blinks the disorienting light away, he realizes he sees himself and Mabel at the kitchen table...

* * *

"Are ready for the ultimate challenge?" Mabel asks, holding up her favorite breakfast topping, Sir Syrup. Dipper smiles in return at her, before brandishing his own bottle of Mountie Man maple syrup.

"I'm always ready!" he says, as he flips open the spout. Both Dipper and Mabel hold the spouts up and above their faces.

"Then you know what this means!" Mabel says, grinning from ear to ear.

"Syrup race!" they both shout at the same time. They both tilt back their syrup bottles, and start to drip the sticky, sweet substance into their mouths. "Ahhh!" they both shout at the same time. Dipper's barely begins to drip down, and he panics seeing Mabel's syrup beginning to drip.

"Go, Mountie Man!" Dipper shouts, while Mabel cheers on her own.

"Go, Sir Syrup!", Mabel responds to her brother's own cheers.

"Go, go!" they both chant, as the syrup begins to drip further, "Go, go!" Mabel's syrup droplet begins to drip closer.

"Almost... almost..." she states, tapping the bottom of her bottle, causing the sweet substance to drip onto her tongue, "Yes! * _cough_ * I won! * _cough_ *" She begins to whoop, before sitting back and splashing her brother with water.

"Hey!" Dipper states, picking up his newspaper to move it away, "Watch your tail, I don't want water splashed all over this morning newspaper..." Mabel giggles as Dipper begins to read, adjusting her scaly Mermaid's tail in the kiddie pool she sat in, so the water didn't cup out on the end, the pink scales flashing bright neon pink, and glittering in the morning sunlight. Dipper himself steps pack, watching where he placed his hooves, so as not to damage them. Turning to a new page, Mabel recognizes the fact that an article catches his interest, when the deertaur's ears flip up in excitement. "Ho, ho, no way!" he exclaims, as he walks over to Mabel, while watching his steps, showing her the page that caught his interest, "Hey Mabel, check this out!"

Mabel catches sight of the ad on the left, showcasing a giant hamster ball. "Monster sized hamster ball?" she sates, her voice filling with excitement as she tries to pull herself up onto the table, "I'm monster-sized!" Dipper laughs, then points her over to the opposite page.

"No, no, Mabel. This." he states, pointing to a picture of a man standing with a peace sign and forked tongue sticking out, a camera around his neck, standing next to some weird, hairless beast wearing some kind of hat and a dopey grin, "We see weirder stuff than that every day!" He then looks puzzled for a moment, looking over to Mabel. "We didn't get any photos of those Gnomans, did we?"

"Nope, just memories," she states, before pulling out a tuft of white hair from her sweater, "And this piece of beard hair!"

"Why did you save that?" Dipper asks his sister in partial disgust. Mabel merely shrugs him off, and puts the beard hair back wherever it was she had hidden it. Then the heavy footsteps of Grunkle Stan coming through the kitchen are heard. He pulls his massive bulk through the doorway, pulling his stone wings close to his back and dragging his long tail along behind him. His nearly glowing, yellow eyes are bright despite the morning light, showcasing a frightening appearance.

"Good morning, knuckleheads," Stan states with a smile on his face, dragging heavy claws over Dipper's head to ruffle his hair, "You two know what today is?" Dipper and Mabel both look up at him, puzzlement on their faces.

"Umm…" Dipper begins, deciding to guess, "Happy anniversary?" Mabel's laughing, as she too jumps to conclusions.

"Mazel tov!" She shouts, splashing some water onto the floor and the table. Dipper moves his food a little bit farther way from her splash zone, as he brushes water off he table. Stan laughs, hitting Dipper's head with his own newspaper.

"It's Family Fun Day!" He states, dragging his body over to the fridge and pulling out a carton of milk, "We're cuttin' off work and…" He trails off, sniffing the carton of milk, before bringing it out. "We're having one of those, you know…" Stan states, "Bonding-type deals." Dipper and Mabel both look at him questioningly, before Dipper speaks up.

"Uh, Grunkle Stan, is this gonna be…" he starts, "Anything like our last family bonding day?" Dipper flashes back to the day Stan convinced them to forge counterfeit bills, before the sirens started, and this causes Mabel to shiver involuntarily.

"The county jail was so cold," Mabel states, shivering despite the warmth, "So cold…"

Stan nods, and closes his eyes, putting both his arms on his nibblings, and he addresses them both. "All right, maybe I haven't been the best summer caretaker," he admits freely, "But I swear, today we're gonna have some real family fun." He fishes out some blindfolds from his pockets, and holds them up for both children to see. "Now, who wants to put on some blindfolds and get into my car?" He asks so nonchalantly, that both Dipper and Mabel exclaim their enthusiasm.

"Wait, what?" Dipper says, processing Stan's words.

Stan is driving the Stanley Mobile down a long stretch of highway, Dipper and Mabel both blindfolded in the backseat. Stan leans down to adjust the radio with his massive paws, taking his eyes off the road, as the tires screech in protest at the shift in weight. "Who's, whoa!" Dipper sighs, as he tries to ignore the bumps in the old car, he mutters to himself, "Blindfolds never lead to anything good."

"Wow!" Mabel states, her head in a fishbowl to keep her hydrated out of the pool, "I feel like all my other senses are heightened…" She blindly reaches out with her hands, aiming for Dipper. "I can see with my fingers!" She states, brushing all around Dipper's face, causing him to laugh in response. He tried to keep his nervousness in check, but the car hitting another rough bump causes him to become concerned, causing him to flatten his ears to his head.

"Whoah, Grunkle Stan!" Dipper states in alarm, "Are you wearing a blindfold?"

"Ha ha," Stan laughs, adjusting his mirror slightly, "Nah, but with my night vision, on top of my cataracts, I might as well be." He squints and looks forward, as he tries to make out through the windshield what is ahead of him. "What is that, a woodpecker?" he mutters to himself, before the car careens through a poorly made wooden guardrail.

By the time Stan brings the car to a full stop, there are branches and sticks poking out from the grill. "Ok, ok, everyone out of the car," he states, exiting the car and helping Dipper and Mabel out of the vehicle, "Sit tight and prepare to be amazed!" He brushes off some sticks and pine needles from his suit, and smiles as he takes in the two blindfolded twins in front of him. "Ok, okay," he states, preparing to see their wowed faces, "Open 'em up!" Dipper and Mabel both remove their blindfolds, and stare in disbelief at their Grunkle before them. "Ta-da!" Stan exclaims, as the view changes to reveal the majestic glory of Lake Gravity Falls, "It's fishing season!"

"Fishing?" Mabel states, as she begins to hyperventilate, seeing all the shiny hooks and fish being dragged from their homes. Dipper quickly tries to calm his Mer-Twin down, knowing fully well how opposed she was to sports fishing versus fishing for food.

"What're you playin' at, old man?" Dipper asks his Grunkle, "You know how Mabel gets around fishing lures and lines; I had to cut her loose when she tried to snag a lure, just last week!"

"She'll be fine, besides I've seen her pack down those spicy tuna rolls, so just trust me kid!" Stan states, "You're gonna love it! The whole town's out here!" As he moves away, it does become apparent that a majority of the towns folk is out on the water.

Lazy Susan is on her boat, waving a frying pan into the water with one hand, while balancing a fishing pole in the other. "Here, fishy fishies!" she calls out, rolling her tail out behind her while licking her whiskers, "Mrroww... get into the pan!" The one-eyed, calico cat woman looks intently at her prey. As they look around, they also see Toby Determined taking a picture of a hobgoblin with a large fish in his hands, the small imp readies himself.

"Say cheese!" he states, taking the picture and causing his flash to go off, resulting in the man stumbling backwards and into the lake, "Ho ho!" Nearby, Manly Dan and his sons are on their own fishing boat.

"Uh, is this good?" Marcus, Kevin, and Gus ask, holding up a fishing pole. The rod is taken from the Multi-Cub's hands, by the Manotaur in lumberjack flannel.

"No!" Manly Dan shouts loudly, into all three of his sons heads, before breaking the pole over his manly kneecap, "I'll show you how a real man fishes!" The bull headed manotaur thrusts his hand into the water, and pulls a massive fish from the water, before beginning to beat it up. "Ha ha ha!" he shouts in triumph, throwing it into the air and into the middle of their boat. He then jumps and body slams it, before punching the stubborn fish repeatedly.

"Dad! Dad! Dad!" the three headed Multi-bear cub shouts, watching their father in awe, before they pan over to reveal Tyler Cutebiker standing in his nearby boat.

"Get 'em!" the cute elf states, cheering the Manotaur on, "Get 'em!" Quickly the Pines siblings refocus their attention back on their Grunkle.

"That's some quality family bonding!" Stan states, looking out over the lake and smiling. Both Dipper and Mabel look at each other, with Dipper choosing to speak up.

"Grunkle Stan, why do you want to bond with us, all of a sudden?" he asks, crossing his arms with a skeptical look. Stan's eyebrows raise, and he turns back to face both of his niblings.

"Come on, this is gonna be great!" Stan replies, walking over to the twins, "I've never had fishing buddies before." HE unfolds his wings and stretches them out, as the twins notice his tail writhe around on the ground in annoyance. "The guys from the lodge won't go with me," he states, putting his hands up and readying air quotes, "They don't 'like', or 'trust' me." Dipper and Mabel both look at each other, before Mabel speaks up.

"I think he actually wants to fish with us," she states, before turning back to Stan.

"Hey, I know what'll cheer you sad sacks up!" Stan exclaims joyfully, before rummaging through his pockets and pulling something out and slapping it onto Dipper and Mabel's heads, "Pow!" Two fishing hats now rest gently on the twins heads, or over his hat in the case of Dipper. "Pines family fishing hats!" Stan says chuckling, "That-that's hand stitching, you know." Dipper's hat has his name embroidered on it in colorful letters, as does Mabel's, but the 'L' begins to peel off from the fabric. "It's just gonna be you, me, and those goofy hats on a boat for ten hours!" he says in glee, much to the horror of the twins.

"Ten hours?" Dipper questions, as Stan rummages the inside of his fishing vest. After a few seconds of looking he pulls out a small book.

"I brought the joke book!" he exclaims, holding up the book entitled 1001 Yuk 'Em Ups. Dipper scrabbles back on four hooves, ears pulled back in horror.

"No!" he yells out, terrified, " _No_!" Mabel then turns to Dipper.

"There has to be a way out of this..." she states. Suddenly all three of them turn towards the dock, as they hear yelling and a commotion. To men were pushed away, as a crazed hillbilly started running their way.

"I SEEN IT!" the Kill-Billy yells out, "I SEEN IT AGAIN!" As he was running, he crashed into various things, slapping a sandwich out of someone's hands, before stopping in the crowded dock and grabbing hold of the nearest person to shake. "The Gravity Falls Gobblewonker!" he shouts, "Come quick before it scrabdoodles away!" He dances in place, slapping his knee as he finishes.

"Aww,.." Mabel coos, dragging herself slightly forward towards the commotion, "He's doing a happy jig!" The old man gets his nose nearly into the mermaid's face, shaking her slightly as he yells.

"NOOO!" he shouts, "It's a jig of grave danger!" Suddenly, the nearby building opens up, to reveal a tall, Gremlin come out of the shack, with a spray bottle in his hand, hair obscuring most of his face.

"Hey, hey!" he says as he approaches the old man, "Now what did I tell you about scaring my customers?" He begins to spray the old man, who hisses in return, baring his sharp teeth. "This is your last warning, Dad!" the Gremlin Lake Ranger states.

"But I got proof this time, by gummity!" he replies, beckoning everyone over to the dock. He moves to the edge of the dock, and points into the water at a capsized dingy front of the dock. "Behold!", "he states loudly, "It's the Gobble-dy-wonker what done did it!" He turns back to his son and the gathered crowd. "It had a long neck, like a Gee-raffe!" he states, "And wrinkly skin like...like this gentleman right here!" He points to Stan, who was cleaning out his earwax, before mumbling in confusion at McGucket. "It chawed my boat up to smitheroons, and shimshammed over to Scuttlebutt Island!" he states, raising his voice, "YOU GOTTA BELIEVE ME!" He grabs his son's arm, trying to pull him towards him, but he pulls away in pity. The police boat is shining its light over at the commotion, and the sheriff half of the two headed dragon spoke up.

"Attention all units!" he states, guffawing a bit, "We got ourselves a crazy old man!" Everyone but the Pines trio and the Ranger point and laugh at Old Man McGucket. His son merely shakes his head in shame at the scene.

"Aww, donkey spittle," Old Man McGucket states, kicking a rock off the dock as he walks away, "Aw, banjo polish!" By the time the crowd disperses, and Old Man McGucket leaves, only Stan and the Twins are left standing on the dock.

"Well, that happened," Stan states, "Now lets untie this boat, and get out on this lake!" The gargoyle man, delicately steps out onto his boat, and starts untying it from the dock, as more water starts to seep in the little dingy.

"Mabel, did you hear what that old guy said?" he says excitedly, looking at her.

"Aww, donkey shpittle!" she mimics the voice of Old Man McGucket, which causes Dipper to smile and laugh, before getting serious.

"The other thing," he states, "About the monster!" He grabs out the magazine and turns it to the page with the photo contest on it. "If we can snag a photo of it, we can split the prize fifty-fifty," Dipper states, as Mabel's eyes widen in awe.

"That's two fifties!" she states, looking back at Dipper.

"Imagine what you could do with five...Hundred...Dollars!" he states. Being Mabel, her imagination quickly gets the best of her.

Mabel imagines herself in the Mystery Shack gift shop, in a giant sized hamster ball filled with water, a smaller hamster ball filled with a hamster sitting on a nearby desk. "Not so high and mighty now, are you?" she asks the rodent, which squeaks in reply, "Aha haha ha...heehee..." She crashes through the way, wobbling all the way as the water within sloshes around.

Two smoking-hot men pull up in their red convertible, blonde and blue hair flowing in the rad wind. "Hey boys!" a sultry voice states, as both look gobsmacked at the source of the voice, which is Mabel in the giant hamster ball, "You can look, but you can't touch." As the walk signal crosses, she swims away under her own power, rolling and squeaking as she leaves them behind like dust on the wind.

"Mabel, Mabel!" Dipper states, snapping in front of his sister's eyes, out of Mabeland.

"Dipper, I am one million percent on board with this!" she states, as both twins turn to their Grunkle Stan, who is readying the boat.

"Grunkle Stan!" he calls out,a s their Grunkle turns around to stare at them, "Change of plans; we're taking that boat to Scuttlebutt Island, and we're going to find that Gobblewonker!" Stan doesn't get a chance to say anything at first, as he is cut off by cheering.

"Monster hunt! Monster hunt!" they chant, before a third voice joins them in the excitement.

"Monster hunt!" Old Man McGucket states, befre trailing off as the twins stare at the old Kill-Billy, and he gets nervous, "Monster...Eh.. I'll go." As McGucket walks away, a honking is heard and an older model fishing boat pulls into the dock.

"You dudes say somethin' about a monster hunt?" a highly accented voice states, before Soos appears out from behind the wheelhouse of the ship, dripping clay slightly onto the deck.

"Soos!" Mabel calls out, and the clay homunculus looks down at her from his perch above the dock.

"Wassup, hambone!" he calls out, fist bumping the mermaid and making explosion noises with her, "Dudes, you could totally use my boat for your hunt." He motions to the boat and begins to describe its features. "It's got a steering wheel, chairs..." Soos states, before turning back to the Twins and Stan, "Normal boat stuff." AS he drips a little bit more onto the deck, the twins hear Stan clear his throat.

"All right, alright, let's think this through," Stan states, "Ya kids could go waste your time on some epic monster-finding adventure, or you could spend the day learning how to tie knots and skewer worms with your great Uncle Stan!" For a moment, the twins look between Soos, who is doing the robot on the deck of his ship, an towards Stan and his leaky boat, as he sniffs his left armpit. They look at Scuttlebutt Island int he distance, before turning to grin at each other.

"So, whaddaya say?" Stan asks, closing his eyes for a second and grinning in ensured triumph.

"We made the right choice!" Mabel's voice trails off, and Stan opens his eyes in disappointment.

"Yes!" Soos calls out, as he drives off towards the island.

He shakes his fist towards the _S.S. Cool Dude_ , disappointment on his face at his niblings decisions. "Ingrates!" he mutters under his breath, "Aw, who needs 'em? I got a whole box of creepy fishing lures to keep me company." He looks at the box of faux fish lures, and the flies buzzing around them, he cringes a bit and closes the lid.

Meanwhile, Dipper stood near the stern of the ship, hand to his eyes as he stares at his goal ahead of him, Scuttlebutt Island. "Raise the anchor!" he shouts to Soos, how raises a chained cinder block from the water, which suddenly cuts through his clay hands and causes a mess on the deck.

"I'm okay!" he shouts, as he gathers up the gooey mess. Dipper looks over at his friend in concern, before moving on.

"Raise the sail!" he orders, as Mabel raises a beach towel with the word 'Fun' and a Sun with sunglasses on it, "We're gonna win that photo-contest!"

"Do any of you dudes have sunscreen?" Soos asks, before Dipper and Mabel look at each other.

"Were gonna... go get sunscreen!" he shouts, as Soos turns the boat back towards the dock. As Soos and Mabel cheer on, a strange shape passes by underneath where they were.

Five minutes later, after slathering on sunscreen onto Dipper's arms and face, and Mabel's arms, the crew is back and ready to hunt monsters. Dipper was pacing on deck, as he prepared for his toughest assignment. "Alright, if we wanna win this contest, we gotta do it right!" he states, "Think! What's the number one problem with most monster hunts?" Soos and Mabel look at each other, before Soos raises a hand.

"You're a side character, then you die within the first five minutes of the movie," before realization struck his face, "Dude, am I a side character? Do y'ever think about stuff like that?" As Soos ponders, Dipper shakes his head.

"No, no, no," he affirms, "Camera trouble!" Mabel and Soos both just stare at him. "Say Bigfoot shows up," Dipper states, looking towards Soos he says, "Soos, be Bigfoot?" Soos begins posing. "There he is! Bigfoot!" Dipper starts to say in a higher pitched voice, patting at his vest as he speaks, "Uh-oh, no camera!" He then pulls one from out of his vest, and looks at it in awe. "Oh, wait, here's one! Aw, no film!" he states, before resuming his normal sounding voice, "You see? You see what I'm doing here?" Soos nods and looks toward Mabel.

"Oh, yeah," Soos states, "Dude's got a point." Then Dipper begins speaking again.

"That's why bought seventeen disposable cameras!" he states, listing off their location and showing them to Soos and Mabel, "Three in my jacket, four for each of you, three extras in this bag, and one... under my hat!" He pulls up his hat and reveals one nestled atop his head. "And let's not forget two in Soos' ankles," he states, as Soos looks down in amazement to see two camera's already in his shoes, "There's no way we're going to miss this, so everybody, let's test our cameras out!"

Soos quickly takes one of his cameras out and faces it toward him, before taking a picture and blinding him self. "Aw dude!" he exclaims, before lossing his grip of the camera and letting it fall overboard.

"You see, this is why you need backup cameras," Dipper states calmly, looking at the others, "We still have sixteen..."

"Ahhh, BIRD!" Mabel screams, tossing a camera at a hovering seagull.

"Fifteeen!" Dipper states, just a little bit agitated, "Okay guys, I repeat: don't lose your camera!"

Soos holds a bag of cameras over the side of the ship out of a misunderstanding. "Wait, lose the cameras?" he states, letting goof the bag, "Dude, I just threw two away..."

"Don't!" Dipper cries out, as he watches the cameras fall over board, "Thirteen! All right, we still have thirteen camer-" Dipper accidentally crushes one under hoof, and he tries not to seethe. "Twelve," he tries to stay calm, "We have twelve cameras..."

"So, what's the plan?" Mabel asks,flopping over the railing with her fish body, "Throw more cameras overboard or what?"

Suffice it to say, after twenty minutes of going back and forth, and allowing Mabel to be Co-Captain, and making Soos an associate Co-Captain, and losing some more cameras, they finally land on Scuttlebutt Island.

"Traitors..." Stan mutters under his breath, watching them as they landed on the small island, "Ah, I'll find my own fishing buddies!" Stan begins to looks around, before spying a Satyr and Nymph couple standing around in their own boat. "Ah ha!" Stan states, starting up his boats engine, "There's my new pals!"

The satyr is looking away from the Nymph, looking at a ring in a box, taking a deep breath as he prepares himself for what he is about to ask. "Now that we're alone, Rosanna, there's a burning question which my heart longs to ask of you..." The nymph looks at the ring and her eyes begin to tear up.

"Oh, Reginald!" she cries out, as she reaches out to accept the ring. Suddenly the roar of a dying engine disturbs their peace, and they both look to see an intrusive gargoyle suddenly pulling up alongside their boat.

"Hey!" Stan says, "Wanna hear a joke?" He doesn't even hesitate to let them answer, as he begins the joke. "My ex-wife still misses me... but her aim is gettin' better!" he states, pausing to let them get the punch line, "Her aim is gettin' better... Y'see, it's-it's funny because marriage is terrible." Reginald and Rosanna both look steamed at Stan, decisively rowing their bat away and leaving him alone in the lurch. "What?" he asks no one in particular as they row away, not understanding what was up.

A few minutes later, and Stan had already found another unlucky target of his expertise. "Look, when you're threadin' the line-a lot of people don't know this-but you wanna use a barrel knot," Stan says, whispering and moving in close to the short Kappa, "That's a secret from one fishing buddy to another!" As Stan chuckles to himself, the terrified child just tries to back away from the gargoyle.

"Uh, I, uh..." the kappa child mumbles, "Who are you, exactly?" Stan merely pats the kid on the back, nearly causing him to fall into the water.

"Just call me your GRUNKLE STAN!" he states, just a bit too enthusiastic. As Stan pulls back, protective, feathery arms suddenly encircle the child, and Stan realizes it belonged to the boys mother, who was a Harpy.

"Sir, SIR, SIR!" the harpy chirped loudly, her face distorted by rage, "Why are you talking to our son?" Her plumage ruffles and bulges out, and the icy leer he was getting from the boys father wasn't any better. "If you don't leave right now, I'm calling the police!" she states, and Stan realizes when he isn't wanted...yet.

"Ha, ha, you see, the thing about that is..." Stan starts, before kicking his motor into high gear and speeding off away from the kappa, harpy, and massive and silent Yeti. He just wasn't having a good day.

* * *

After a half-hour of butt jokes out of the island's sign, walking through dense, thick fog, losing their lantern to a racoon, mistaking some beavers for the Gobblewonker, and finding out disappointingly that the inhumane growl was a beaver chewing up an old, rusted chainsaw, Dipper, Mabel, and Soos were all about to give up.

"Man, this was all a bust... no monster, no money, no fame, no talk shows," Dipper states, as he has his back to the water front. A shadow moves over the water, though none of them sees it yet. Mabel sighs loudly and turns to her brother as well.

"Yeah, no giant hamster balls either," Mabel states dejectedly, "Which means having to depend on you guys for rides..." The twins sigh against each other, as Soos watches a silhouette raise up behind the two little dudes.

"Dudes, like, I think Mabel should get on you Dipper," Soos states, as the twins look at him weirdly, "Don't panic, but I think the Gobblewonker-" Suddenly Dipper and Mabel both feel a blast of cold, chilling air on their backs, and as Dipper starts to look back, hes stopped by Mabel, who hops on his back and forces his eyes forward.

"Onward Aoshima!" Mabel states, slapping his hindquarters and causing him to nearly rear up out of right, "Arriba, Arriba, Andale!" Just as Dipper was about to question his sister's motives, the Gobblewonker soars, causing Dippers fight or flight instincts to well up in primal terror, and he begins running with Mabel and Soos behind him. They barely dodge a falling tree, as the Gobblewonker chases them into the forest, and the three make a break for the _S.S. Cool Dude_ , losing a few more of their cameras in the process. As Dipper and Mabel quickly get in the boat, with Soos pushing them off, Dipper tries to get a camera to work.

"A cracked lens?" he cries out, looking to Mabel for more, "Mabel, get a photo!" He watches as Mabel quickly throws her cameras at the pursuing monster. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" he cries out, "What about the photo!" As the Gobblewonker snaps at the boat, Soos turns back towards Dipper.

"Dude, I still got one left!" he states, tossing it at dipper, "Don't worry dude!" As Dipper goes for it, one of his feet slip on the water, causing hi to miss the catch and causing the camera to hit the wall and shatter to pieces. The Gobblewonker then gives chase, following them into the water.

* * *

"Er, ugh, gah!" Stan mutters loudly to himself, busy trying to tie a knot in some rope, his massive paws and claws not cooperating with him, "Mollycoddling..." As heworks, he picks up the sound of children laughing, and finds a boat not to far away from him.

A few yards away, a Dwarf, Gnome, and Barf Fairy sit fishing. The Dwarf is evidently their grandpa, as the Gnome and Barf Fairy are fairly young and obviously twins like Dipper and Mabel. "Can you pwease tell me mo'e funny stories, Pop Pop?" the boy Gnome states cutely. The dwarf smiles down at the gnome, and answers him kindly.

"Anything for my fishing buddies!" he laughs, patting both the fairy and the gnome on their heads. Stan growls to himself, guttural and low in his chest.

"Pop Pop?" the gnome boy states, "I just weewized dat... I wuv you." Stan nearly pukes in his mouth at the saccharine sweetness the kid was pulling, and he decided to voice it.

"Aw, come on!" Stan states, obviously loud enough for the patrons of the other boat to take note, "Booo! Boo!" Suddenly the dwarf became livid, jumping up on his stubby legs to stare down Stan.

"Hey, now!" the angry, little dwarf states, "What's the big idea?" He was about to continue, when the boy draws himself into the conversation.

"Maybe he has no one who wuvs him, Pop Pop," the boy states innocently. It causes a smile to rise ont he dwarf's face, and Stan's frown to deepen.

"Yeah, well, I...I..." Stan begins, before he trails off by suddenly lurching in his boat. A wave suddenly sprays him from behind, having curled up in the wake of the _S.S. Cool Dude_ passing behind him, causing the wall of water to come crashing down onto Stan. He angrily tosses down his hat to the ground, before sitting down and sighing in misery.

"SOOS, BEAVERS!" Dipper cries out, as Soos steers the ship straight through and old, broken boat that had been the beaver's impromptu home. The resulting crash caused beavers to rain on deck, as they bit into the boat and the fleeing crew. As they struggle to remove the beavers from the boat, Soos looses control as a beaver attacks his face, prompting Mabel to take the wheel and steer away from the Gobblewonker. Using the beavers as ammo, Dipper tries to dislodge them, and manages to drive the creature back underwater. Despite losing the monster, after passing through a crowded fishing spot, the creature capsizes passing boats behind them.

One such boat held Manly Dan and his Sons, with Manly Dan still fighting in a headlock with the fish. "Dad! Dad! Dad!" the three heads chant, as they watch their Manotaur father wrestle the fish. Suddenly the Gobblewonker passes underneath them, overturning their boat and causing fish to rain from the skies, as they were launched into the air.

"The fishes!" Manly Dan states, treading water, "They seek revenge!" He finds his boys, also treading water, and begins to swim ashore. "Swim, boys, swim!" he cries out, "Swim!"

In the meantime, Mabel manages to shatter glass in the middle of a lake, as two movers foolishly got caught between the _S.S. Cool Dude_ , and freedom from the Gobblewonker. As Mabel steered the boat, she panicked once she saw there wasn't anything ahead of them but rocks and a waterfall. It was a dead end! "WHERE DO I GO?" she cries out to Dipper, as the Gobblewonker closes in on them fast.

Dipper quickly looks around, takes out the Journal,and flips through it, until he finds the page he's looking for. "Um...uh... GO INTO THE FALLS!" he cries out over the spray, towards Mabel, "I think there might be a cave behind there!" Mabel looks at him incredulously.

" _MIGHT BE?_ " she screams at a high pitch, but then steels herself to do it. They would either face their death at the hands of a mythical lake beast, or smash into rocks and possibly survive by not drowning. As the ship coasts through the falls, and into the massive cavern behind it, they hit land hard. Crashing and beaching the watercraft, they all get sent to the dirt floor. Standing up, they turn around to see the Gobblewonker swim in after them. Snapping its jaws at them, they prepare for the end, until they realize the massive beast had gotten stuck in the cavern entrance.

"It's stuck!" Mabel cries out in relief, laughing along with Dipper and Soos at being alive still.

"Ha ha! Yeah!" Dipper cries out in relief, before it dawns on him, "Wait... it's stuck?" He quickly pats all over his stash of cameras, only to be disappointed none of the ones in his jacket or Soos' shoes had survived the trip into the cave. Dejected, Dipper looks downcast, until Mabel lifts his hat and reveals the last camera hidden under the cervitaur's cap.

Dipper quickly gets to work taking pictures of the thrashing beast, until he gets his fill and Mabel turns to him. "Didja get a good one?" she asked. He smiled and held up the camera like some precious gem.

"THEY"RE ALL GOOD ONES!" He yells, hugging his sister in the process, as she squeals in happiness knowing she would be getting her giant hamster ball. Before they could continue their jolly merriment, the sudden cracking with in the confines of the cavern, echoed and drew the attention of all three patrons toward a stalactite on the ceiling. In one fell swoop, the Gobblewonker gets hit by the massive rock, as the mechanical roaring is shut off by the blow, and crackles like static electricity on a new shirt.

"What the?" Dipper states, before hopping daintily over rocks with his four hooves. Reaching the Gobblewonker, he knocks on its side, frowning as he does so. "Huh..." he mutters to himself, feeling over the scaly beast.

"What's wrong?" Mabel asks, slipping into the water and swimming around to her brother. Dipper gives a look to Mabel, as he knocks on the stomach of the knocked out beast. The resounding sound proves the beast is actually hollow, and Dipper finds what he was looking for and proceeds to slowly climb to the top.

"Careful dude..." Soos warns him from the safety of the beached boat.

"I've got this!" Dipper shouts back, crawling to the other side of the Gobblewonker, dipping out of sight until e popped back up, "Hey, Guys! Come check this out!" As Mabel swims around to meet him on the other side, Soos hops onto the Gobblewonker, helps Mabel up and out of the water, and joins Dipper at what appears to be a hidden door. With Soos' help they turn the latch, and steam rushes out into the cooler air. Inside the machine, Old Man McGucket sits meddling with doohickeys and gizmos.

"Work the bellows and the... Eh?" McGucket states, looking up at the light streaming in from behind him, a sad look crossing the face of the Kill Billy, sharp teeth poking out as he frowns, "Aww, banjo polish!" Dipper and the others are left in shock, staring down at the old man.

"Wha- Yo- _You?!_ " Dipper states in disbelief, "You made this? W- w-why?" McGucket looks down at his sharp claws, twiddling his thumbs before looking up at the group who uncovered his secret.

"Well, I... I, uh... I just wanted the attention," he states in shame, hanging his head low and getting sad. He takes off his hat and pulls it over his chest, looking up at the three.

"I still don't understand," Dipper states. At this McGucket brightens, replacing his hat and begins pointing crazily at random around his machine.

"Well, first I hootenannied up a bio-mechanical bran wave generator," McGucket states, pointing to his head, "And then I learned to operate a stick-shift with ma beard!" As he says that last part, his beard moves on its own, moving the stick shift and causing the 'monster' to jolt.

"Okay, yeah," Dipper states, giving him credit for breaking the hillbilly stereotype of being dumb and/or a crazy redneck, but it still left him with another question, "But why did you do it?"

"Well, when you get to be an old fella like me, nobody pays attention to you anymore," McGucket states.

* * *

 _McGucket is outside is son's office, holding a chewed up baseball in his sharp teeth, with a pair of gloves in his hand. His son, Tate McGucket, is seen from inside the ranger's station, closing his blinds on his father, as he stares impassively._

* * *

"My own son hasn't visited me in months!"

* * *

 _The Kill Billy is now seen inside the metal skeleton of the Gobblewonker, assembling parts with a welding mask and miscellaneous devices by him._

* * *

"So, I figured maybe I'd catch his fancy with a fifteen ton aquatic robut!" McGucket states, giving a smile so full of sharp teeth, it causes the three to cringe like they were staring down a shark, "Hehehehe haha!" McGucket breaks out into hysterics, only to stop and look down, sighing as he does so. "In retrospect, it seems a bit contrived," he runs a clawed hand through his beard as he looks up to the Pines twins and Soos, "You just don't know the length us old-timers go through for a little quality time with our family."

This causes both twins to pause, and stare down at their Grunkle's discarded fishing hats, and they both sigh. "Dude..." Soos states, interjecting in the twins' moment, "I guess the real lake monster is you two." He starts to chuckle, but he notices the twins look even more dejected at his comment. "Sorry, that just like-boom-" Soos states, throwing his hands out like an explosion, "-just popped into my head there."

Dipper looks down at McGucket, and gives him a sympathetic smile. "So, did you ever talk to your son about how you felt?" Dipper asks. He notices the look of realization dawn on the Kill Billy's face, and smiles.

"No, sir, I got to work straight on the robut!" McGucket states, before hitting a panel and revealing a projector and screen, "I made lots of robuts in my day!" Blueprints for the Gobbelwonker show up, before he projects a new slide. "Like when my wife left me and I created a homicidal pterodactyl-tron," McGucket says, as the words 'Chaos' are emblazoned on the slide, which shows a massive robot pterodactyl breathing fire down on the town, "Or when my pal Ernie didn't come to my retirement party." The next slide shows an aquatic monster,a fish-man, before he pushes another slide which projects a newspaper clipping showing a large robot terrorizing the town, the word 'DISASTER' on the cover. "And I constructed an eighty ton SHAME BOT THAT EXPLODED THE ENTIRE DOWNTOWN AREA!" McGucket states, breaking into another fit of insane laughter, "Well, time to get back to work on my death ray!" He ducks back into the Gobblewonker, and the three go to get off the machine, when McGucket's clawed hand, slowly raises from the belly of the beast. "Any of you kids got a screwdriver?" he asks, but is promptly ignored.

"Well, so much for the photo contest..." Dipper states, taking out the last camera. Mabel stands next to him, and puts a semi-wet hand on his shoulder.

"You still have one roll of film left," she states, pointing to the camera. Dipper smiles.

"Whaddaya wanna do with it?" he asks his twin.

* * *

Stan looks defeated as he drives his boat back to the shore, sighing as he heads toward the dock. "Hey! Over here!" a shout from nearby states. The gargoyle looks over, to see the _S.S. Cool Dude_ driving up, and both boats stop. Dipper raises the camera and takes a photo of Stan.

"What the-Kids?" Stan states, rubbing his eyes from the flash, "I thought you two were off playing 'Spin the Bottle' with Soos!" Dipper puts a hand to his head and lazily holds the camera close to him.

"Well... we spent all day trying to find a 'legendary' dinosaur," Dipper starts off. Mabel cuts in.

"But we realized, the only dinosaur we wanna hang out with is right here!" Mabel finishes, as she slips into the water and surfaces ont he side of Stan's boat, her arms hanging over its side.

"Save your sympathy for this old gargoyle!" Stan grumbles, "I've been having a great time withoutcha'!" He looks away from Mabel and continues speaking. "Makin' friends, talkin' to my reflection- I had a run-in with the lake police!" he exclaims in excitement, before pointing to his newly acquired jewelry, "I guess I gotta wear this ankle bracelet now, so that'll be fun." Mabel looks a little bit hurt at that, and slips back into the water, before floating between both boats, while Dipper just takes it in stride.

"So..." Dipper states, "I guess there isn't room in that boat for three more?" Stan decidedly glares at Dipper and Mabel, while the two merely smile in return. In seconds they both have their fishing hats on, and Stan's expression softens.

"You knuckleheads ever seen me thread a hook with my eyes closed?" he asks. Dipper decides to take that bet.

"Five bucks, says you can't do it!" he claims, as he climbs into the _Stanowar._

"You're on!" Stan states, as he helps the cervitaur into the boat, and pulls Mabel out of the water.

"Five more bucks says you can't do it with your eyes closed, _plus_ me singing at the top of my lungs!" Mabel states, laughing as they help Soos into the boat.

"I like those odds!" he states, before he gets a good look at the marks in Soos' shirt, "Whoa! What happened to your shirt?"

"Long story, dude," Soos replies, as Dipper ushers everyone together to get a picture, "Dude am I in the picture?" Mabel sits on Stan's lap, her tail hanging off the side, while Stan folds his wings in to show Soos as best as he can, while Soos giant, clay belly and shirt is all that ends up in the picture. With a a bunch of fun ahead of them, and an afternoon of laughs, no one even feels the boat rock under them, or notices the shadow of the Gobblewonker, as it passes by majestically swimming into the depths of Lake Gravity Falls.

* * *

Dipper pulls back, amazed to see just how alien, how monstrous this world was in comparison to his own. "Wow, I never thought Gravity Falls could get even weirder!" he states to the Axolotl, who merely chuckles in return. He looks down, to see what the salamander was laughing about, and he notices he has taken on the form of his Monster Falls counterpart. "I'm a deer- I- I- I'm a centaur?" he looks up at the Axolotl, "A deertaur?" The Axolotl rumbles as Dipper floats helplessly around the milky white expanse of stars, and he adjusts the beanbag for his now cervine guest.

"Most variations of the self evidently named 'Monster Falls', are harmless in and of themselves, usually its a mystical water source that infects the town, or the occasional variation where you were born monsters," the Axolotl states, "This reality is quite unique because it takes an aspect of the observed, and uses it to base what appearance they will take, and not all remain fluid throughout their own variations." He flicks his tail, and sudden swirls of light form around Dipper, as three dipper clones, Tyrone, 5, and 6 appear before him in a cloud of sparkles. Suddenly all three of them morph, into monstrous forms resembling similar features to Dipper's own current form. "While in the majority of these variations you have become a cervitaur, you have the ability to become other creatures as well," the Axolotl announces to Dipper, "Some have you become a Bostaur, because of your courage, others a Caprataur for your stubbornness, and the very rare chance to become a Satyr, due to your power."

Dipper got close to his counterparts, almost able to touch Tyrone, until they all dissolved back into the star stuff they were composed of. He grasps for the last wisps of Tyrone, before returning his attention to the Axolotl. "Did Bill have something to do with why this universe ended up like it did?" he asks, and the Axolotl remains silent, "Figures, only a monster would get sick pleasure out of turning others into something like himself." The Axolotl nods, and for the briefest of moments it seems like it wished to say something.

"Did you know that the stream that changes everyone into monsters, the _Fluvius Cantatis_ , is not just the name of an enchanted, sometimes cursed, stream that runs through Gravity Falls?" the Axolotl states, "On the very rare occasion, at a point between all alternate dimensions within the Nightmare Realm, there is a river that flows into a massive, beautiful waterfall that is the source water, the collective power of the river bleeds into the stream that shares its name, dispersing the magic harmlessly in most dimensions, though magically polluting other versions..." Dipper feels the transformation wear off, as his temper began to cool. "The Nightmare Realm existed long before Bill Cipher ever inhabited it, and it will exist long after into great unknown, into the infinity and beyond," the Axolotl states, "While Bill Cipher is a source of evil, a thorn in your side, the natural course, the balance between dimensions, is sometimes just... coincidence." Dipper mulls on this, and the Axolotl is happy to know that his view was at least being considered. "Now, onto one of the more weirder states that Gravity Falls can manifest as," the Axolotl announces, " _Keep moving forward..._ and all that 'Meet the Robinson's' jazz..."

 **B/N: F... qebv zxiiba jb x jlkpqbo lkzb...**

 **Tev zxk'q vlr pbb jb?**


	4. Kill the Wax Figure

**A/N: I do not own Gravity Falls, obviously that's Disney's department.**

The foggy streets of London are harsh and cold, as the wind rustles through the constable's hair. He pulls his custodian helmet further onto his thinning hairline, and rubs his hands together to get the cold out of them. His cheeks are rosy colored by the morning temperature, accenting his thick mustache and making him look even more ridiculous, standing here and arguing with the only obstacle between himself and a hot cup of tea. "I'm afraid your services won't be required here, sir," the constable relates, "My men have examined the evidence, and this is obviously an accident." He watches as they turn to the scene behind them both, a red telephone booth with the poor sod's arms and legs sticking out between the door.

"An accident, constable?" he states in return, "Or is it... Murder?!" He quickly turns his head away from both the constable and the scene of the crime, his eyes wild and unfocused. His white plumage was ruffled and the constable knew the Duck-tective wouldn't give him any leeway today.

 **Duck-tective will return after these messages.**

* * *

"That duck is a genius!" the boy in front of the television states, as he continues what he crochets, "Ah, Duck-tective, how you sooth my aching soul for rejecting the perceived obvious and digging deeper for the truth!" His twin merely stares at him like he grew a second head.

"Eh, it's easier to find clues-munch- when you're that close to the ground," his twin states between mouthfuls of popcorn, "And-munch- ya' know, he's just a duck, and this is a TV program..." At that he gasps at what his twin insinuates.

"What?" he states, looking eye level to his twin, "Are you saying you could outwit Duck-tective?" He merely rolls his eye in response.

"Will, I have very keen powers of observation that I've trained ever since we started our new life on the road," Bill states, squinting over his twin, "For example, just by giving you a look over..." He examines Will closely, rubbing his chin and then pointing a finger towards his chest. "I can tell you're a sucker!" he laughs, as Will's eyes had followed his finger, before he swiped up and flicked his brother's nose, "Just like those adults back in Piedmont we scammed to get those tickets that brought us to this podunk town." Will Syfer nods, gulping as his mean spirited brother gets up and makes to get more popcorn. William quickly decided that he had enough of the television today, his joy quickly dying as he put away his needles and newest project in a safe place where Bill didn't have easy access.

Bill had just discovered his latest hiding spot, and Will decided he needed to find another loose board or hidden passage to hide it, so the surprise wouldn't be ruined. Thankfully Bill would be heading out to his job at the mechanic's later, meaning he could have the day alone to spend searching the place for some new hiding spot. Speaking of Bill...

"Hey wimp!" Bill called out teasingly, "It's about time for me to get to work, didja' pack my lunch Sad Eyes?" Will merely nodded, pointing to the yellow lunchbox next to the fridge, and Bill smiled at his brother. "Thanks bro, just wait till we save up enough money!" Bill states, walking around to his brother and bringing him closer, "No more jobs, just the high-class stuff, and not that 'brown meat' in cans any more... we could even fix this place up a bit, before winter rolls in..." Will smiles at his brothers promises, but he's learned not to trust one word out of his mouth. Not unless he made a deal, that is, Bill always stuck to deals, no matter how much he twisted them to end up benefiting himself.

But, soon Bill was gone for the rest of the day, and Will had all afternoon to do what he wanted, since Greasy's hadn't gotten back to him about his application for becoming a dishwasher. He begins to sweep some more of the dirt and dust away from the floors, and cobwebs out of the corners of the rooms. He went down one of the lesser used hallways, and was reaching for a particularly giant cobweb, when he tripped over his feet and sent himself scrabbling for a wall to keep himself from falling. As he fell, he felt the wallpaper rip under his hands, but he managed to keep himself from falling face first into the wall as well. Blinking in surprise, he noticed what appeared to be a door knob on the floor. Reaching for it, he picks it up and notices how heavy the brass fixture was in his hands.

He then goes to assess the damage he did to the wall, just imaging how Bill was going to complain, when he noticed it. There was a perfectly circular hole in the wall, like a knot in the wood, but this could not be. Then he looked to the doorknob, and he had the strangest idea to check and see if it fit. With a satisfied click, the doorknob fits like a glove, giving Will a sense of satisfaction and curiosity. Turning open the door, Will breaks off the remaining wallpaper and separates the boards lining the bottom half of the wall to open the door. Inside he finds the creepiest, divest room he had ever laid his eyes on.

It looked like an old storage room, that had been forgotten and closed up when they renovated the shack last, whenever that was. He sees faces, statuettes of people he recognized from history books and the TV, and those that he didn't recognize at least had placards with their names. Coolio, Robin Hood, some… goblin with a mic?

Oh, no it was just Larry King…

Then he noticed the source of sunlight, a pair of blinds in the corner open, and a pile of goo directly underneath it. Dipping his finger in it, he felt it between his hands and realized it was wax. Brushing it off of the plaque p, he realized this pile of goo was one of the former wax statues. "Man, who would leave blinds open right over Abraham Lincoln's head…" a smile crossed his face, as he turned towards another wax statue in the opposite corner of the room, "Oh John Wilkes Booth, you scoundrel you, yeah, I'm looking at you!" Wagging his finger at the history joke, he chuckled as he looked back at the pile of wax. "Hmm, I don't think I have the skills to fix you up, but your great sacrifice won't be in vain Sir," Will states, "Let's just see what I can make with you…" Forgetting Bill and the other wax figures behind him, Will set to work on a project that would take him three days to complete, after fixing up a new block of wax and getting some chisels and tools from a hidden supply closet.

* * *

By the third day, Bill finally figured out something was up, after Will came to the breakfast table half-asleep with a severed arm. He appreciated a good scare now and then, but he hoped his kitten of a brother hadn't actually gone axe-murder crazy on some hapless stranger. Then he realized the arm was made of wax, and he instantly calmed down, until that thought was fully processed. "Dude, where did you get that arm?" Bill asked, looking at his brother who was face first in his scrambled eggs, "Did you rob the town museum, or something?" Will snorts, then looks up drowsy and confused, before turning to Bill in recognition.

"Found a room of wax figures, thought I could fix it up, we open it up to the public as a wax museum," he rambles, "Not Lincoln though, he got assassinated… _snrchhhzzzz_ ". His face begins to fall back down on the table, but Bill moves his plate of food out of the way this time. As he hits his head on the table this time, he bolts up fully awake. "Reality is an illusion!" Will states alarmed, before calming down at seeing Bill, "Huh? Whasup?" He then realizes that he has a severed arm on his table. "Ah, well, I can explain that…" Will states, but Bill holds up his hand.  
"No need to explain, you rambled in your sleep," Bill states, "What's this about a wax museum?"

Will looks up in alarm at Bill, before biting his lip knowing he was caught. "Well, I found a secret room behind some wallpaper and the wall panels," he admits, "It had some wax statues in it, though Abraham Lincoln was all melted, so I decided to craft a new figure and I wanted it to be a surpr-" Bill is suddenly walking away from Will and into the hallway, and before he can catch up, his twin brother is already at the door and stepping inside to the side room.

"Wow, Sad Eyes, you actually found something we could use in this house!" Bill states, "We got a whole collection of historical and pop culture figures here... we could open up a Wax Museum in this dinky shack, and get some funds going to fix this place up!" He squinted as he walked through the crowd of wax figurines, and he noticed one of them covered up with a blanket of sackcloth. "Hey, Will, what's with this one over here..." Bill asks, drawing closer to it.

Bill raises his hand to remove the sheet, but suddenly his hand is batted away by Will, who grasps it very tightly in retaliation. "No! Nonononono!" Will practically screams out in terror, "That's the special one I'm working on still, I was fixing his arm when you called me out for breakfast- he's not ready yet!" Bill pulled his arm free, exasperated by his brothers secrecy, but attention off of the hidden statuette.

"Fine, whatever Sad Eyes, whatever you got under that tarp isn't worth it anyway, not with all these guys," he sweeps his hands across the room, before walking back to the entrance, "All of them are so lifelike... except this one." He points to the female figure, half shrouded by the darkness of the room.

"Hello!" she steps forward, her pink and blue irises swirling in the light. Bill and Will both process this.

"AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" they both scream at the unfamiliar woman. She smiles and quirks her brow at the screaming twins.

"Its-a-me, Mabel!" the voluptuous woman states, as her psychedelic eyes glow in the darkness. The twins continue screaming regardless.

 _Insert Theme Music_

By the time Mabel has moved them to the kitchen, and has put a pot of kettle on the stove, the twins have stopped screaming at her. They both sit at the table, Will studying her warily, and Bill trying to figure out why she looked familiar to him, and why she had broken into their house in the first place. He had noticed that she looked like she was dressed for the 1800's, with a white Victorian style blouse, a black choker with a golden disk, a black corset, a red bustle skirt with a tail that reached all the way to the ground but was hitched up by two clasps in the front, revealing thigh-high stockings with a unique design over the knees, all tucked inside brown, thigh-high, and laced up boots.

"If you two are done ogling my lovely form, I'd like an explanation as to how you two ended up in my art studio?" her icy, neon-blue irises narrow against the neon pinks of her eyes, "I happen to know I forgot about that place over ten years ago, I even took out the doorknob when I found Larry King raiding my fridge for leftovers..." Will is confused by that sentence, but as silly as it was, Bill wouldn't put up with this crazy burglar.

"Who the heck are you?!" Bill asks outright, "You broke into our house, hide in a secret room, and scare the sh-" Mabel quickly boops him on the nose, causing him to hold it out of reflex, and cutting him off mid-sentence.

"How did you get in that room anyway?" Will asks, "I know you weren't in there the last time I went in there, and I know the front and back doors were both locked." Mabel nods and then snaps her fingers. The back door opens, as does every single window in and around the kitchen, and Bill and Will both hear the front door slam into the wall.

"I said I took off the doorknob, I never said I needed a key to get into my own home," she states, "My brother may have allowed you to move in, but some secrets are meant to be kept locked up..." With another snap the house closes up again, and both Will and Bill look at her in awe. Bill opens his mouth to speak, but suddenly finds himself unable to, and finds it hard to swallow.

"You're Dipper's sister?" Will states in awe, "That's why you look so familiar, you must be twins!" Then a look of confusion crosses his face. "Wait, this is your house?" Will says, "When Soos said we could live here, he said it wasn't occupied, and that there was only one landlord who lived here sporadically at best?" Mabel nods with a hand on her chin and eyes closed sagely.

"Correct, Mayor Soos may have allowed you to live here, and Dip-Dop may have hooked you guys up with jobs, and got you started up living here," Mabel states, opening up her eyes narrowly, "I'M the Landlord that lives here sporadically; my Bro-Bro hasn't lived in this house since our Grun... *cough* since our g-grungy, old, cheapskate of a former owner lived here, before they passed the deed to the place to myself and Dipper." She blushes a little bit, her cheeks tinting a light pink that highlights her eyes. "S-so you guys can live here, but I'm the one who pays the mayor to keep this place up and running on the grid, so if you have any complaints about the house, come to me and I'll see what I can do," Mabel looks at Bill with sharp eyes, before turning softer ones to Will, "Due to my job, I'm away from the house for months at a time sometimes, so you'll have to keep your jobs and pay for food and clothes and junk, but utilities like lights, water, gas, etcetera, are already taken care of."

Will beams at this, while Bill merely crinkles his eyes and pouts. "I think I speak for the both of us, Miss Pines, when I thank you for letting us stay in your home," Will states, grabbing one of her hands and shaking it, "We won't let you down ma'am, and thank you for being up front with us about everything..." He wants to ask her about why the workshop was locked away, but he didn't want to offend her.

"Why were those creepy man dolls locked away to rot?" Bill asks bluntly to Mabel's face, and though her eyebrow twitches for a moment, her cool and carefree facade returns.

"I made a mistake, bought the wrong things off the chance to showcase Zero G was more than just an oddball town known for its mysteries and monsters," Mabel states, "That before that mon-before everything changed, that Gravity Falls was still as much a part of this town's history, as much as its future as Zero G Town was." She grips her hand into a tight fist, but takes a deep breath and returns to Bill and Will with a smile. "Back then I had a passion for art, and the previous tenant had bought wax statues that had gotten in a bit of a... messy situation, so I thought I'd fix most of them up," Mabel states, "I got most of them right as rain, but then my work needed to be put first, and I couldn't let anyone just wander into my studio..." She smiles, and shrugs her shoulders.

"So you boarded it up and made every attempt to forget about the room," Bill starts, "But leave the doorknob where any curious passerby could just connect the dots and get into your 'private' art studio..." He huffs, and rolls his eyes at the woman. She merely sticks her tongue out at him in retribution.

"Anyway, its getting pretty late kids, so I better let you all get to bed," Mabel states, noticing the waxing moon shining above the treetops, "You never know what monsters just might be plaguing the darkness out there... plus I have to plan my next route tomorrow and get up super early..." She smiles brightly at the twins, and Will reflexively yawns in agreement. "Good night Will," she states cheerily, before her tone turns bitter and she mumbles a reply to the other twin, "...ad dreams Bill..." Bill looks at her oddly, before shrugging and following his brother up to their shared attic bedroom.

"Things never change, do they dip-dop?" she asks herself, "Better go remove that doorknob before they go all 'axe-murderer' on those Syfer kids..." Mabel walks out of the kitchen, as the moon rises higher into the night sky.

* * *

"Well, Duck-tective, it seems you've really quacked the case," the Constable states towards his partner. The Duck-tective looks back at hi and frowns, quacking in contempt of the joke.

"Don't patronize me," the Duck-tective responds. Ruffling his feathers, the Duck faces their captured perpetrator.

* * *

"Ah, you quack me up Duck-tective," Mabel states, looking towards the kids she says, "Well, I'm gonna use the john. You kids need anything?" Bill and Will both look up from their cereal and pajamas, and shake their heads. After a few minutes, the Syfer twins were starting to get worried, when they finally heard Mabel.

"No... _No_... _Noooooo!_ " Mabel cried out, causing both Bill and Will to discard their mostly-finished breakfast, and rush to see what had her upset.

What they stumble onto to is a disturbing scene. The door was hanging open, though it looked like it was chopped into with some kind of axe, like something had been trying to get out. They barely step inside, when they find Mabel in the middle of the room and cradling a meting wax figure in her arms. "Sherlock!" she cries out, "Who did this to you?" Bill and Will are both shocked, to see wax limbs and torn costumes strewn across the floor and around the room. The only figure left standing appeared to be Genghis Khan, but even he had an axe splitting his wax skull, distorting his face into a silent scream.

"Man, did Jayson Woormees go through this place last night?" Bill asks, "I mean, I know this shack is out in the middle of nowhere, but isn't it usually those summer camps that get hit in horror movies..." Mabel whirled on his sarcastic remark, tears streaming down her face as she pointed her fingers accusingly at the two children.

"You!" Mabel states, pointing to Bill and Will, "And You! Get OUT!" She grabs the severed head of Larry King and lifts it up, looking in his eyes, before turning angrily back at Will and Bill. "My expert handcrafting... besmirched! _Besmiiiiirched_!" she says crying out, "You used Wax Lizzie Borden's left-handed axe to decapitate and dismember all my beautiful works of art!" Bill and Will both look back at Genghis, whose head was caved in by said axe.

"We both were in bed!" Bill shouts back in protest, looking towards Will and grabbing his arm, "Both Sad Eyes and I are light sleepers, if either of us got up, the other would have known!" Mabel turns to Bill and marches up to him, pushing her hands against the smaller boys chest, causing him to stumble into the wall behind him. She hoists him roughly from the floor, and makes him stand against the wooden wall. She puts her hand above his head and measures him through tears, before grabbing his left hand and bringing it up to her waist. Her grip is tight like iron, and Bill feebly tries to break free, Will to horrified to stop Mabel's seemingly random outburst of emotion.

Satisfied, she lets go and mutters to herself, before moving to Will, who shrinks back in fear at Mabel's cold glance. She holds out her left hand, as if expecting him to comply. Gingerly he puts his left hand in hers, though he feels like he might not get it back. Looking over his own hand, Mabel sighs and lets go of Will, walking back to Genghis Khan and pulling the axe from his head. The wax statuette falls to the floor as she successfully manages to remove the axe. "Well boys, you can stay, since I know it wasn't either of you," she states, turning back to the twins, "You're both the right height, but neither of your hands hold splinters, or are even calloused from using the axe, and its wood is too rough and unfinished due to it being a prop, for you not to get either."

"Told ya' neither of us did it!" Bill states, "But I also don't think anyone else was in the house last night..." He rubs his chin and turns to Will. "What about your 'secret' project?" he asks Will, "Is it destroyed too?" Will shakes his head, and moves outside the room for a few minutes, before returning with a wax arm.

"It looked to be untouched, only my wax figures were destroyed," Mabel states, "And no one could have even gotten in because I took off the handle..." Both Will and Bill stare at her, as she realizes she said that last part out louder than she intended to.

"He was underneath that tarp still when we checked last night, besides he isn't even finished yet," Will states, moving over to the corner of the room where the project was stored, "I tried to give him the right color, but it came out wrong, even though I swore I did it right the first few times..." He removes the tarp in a swift move, revealing a red headed, red eyed boy that looked disturbingly like Bill and Will, but only if they got stuck in the sun too long and burned themselves. Suddenly Mabel gasps, and Bill follows suite too. Will turns to see what the problem is, until he sees the only arm the figure had was the left arm.

"No... no... it can't be him!" he says, laughing off Mabel's worried look and Bill's curious glance, "It's a wax figure I made out of the scraps of Abraham Lincoln, besides its not like wax figures can come to life in the middle of the night!" Mabel coughs, and both Bill and Will turn to the blushing woman. She merely waves their attention away, and Will turns back to Bill. "Don't tell me you believe her too!" he states to his twin, "Bill, it's not like they can walk around, their pegged into their stands for goodness sake!" He turns to his triplet, and finishes putting the forgotten right arm on him. Suddenly he squints his eyes, as he notices something wrong with his triplicates shoulder. "Where did you get this..." he states, looking at a slight blemish on the wax figure's shoulder, "You were under the tarp, how did the sun melt you here..." Suddenly he feels himself being drawn back, as Mabel puts herself between both Bill and Will, and the wax figure.

"Okay, that's one last weird thing for us to worry about today, kiddos, don't you both have work today?" she says it more like a command, "Let's not worry about this today, huh?" She quickly shuffles the boys out of the room, but gives one last glance to the smiling wax figure in the corner.

* * *

When Bill and Will both get home, having ate dinner and gotten ready for bed, they find Mabel sitting outside the parlor door in a chair against the wall, with Lizzie Borden's left handed axe. "Uh... should we ask why you're sitting outside this parlor with that axe?" Bill asks, "Or why you seem like you could burn a hole through that door at any moment?" Mabel turns her head towards the twins, smiling as she flips a stray hair from out of her face.

"Don't worry, just lock the doors and don't come down here, no matter what you hear, okay kids?" Mabel states sweetly, an edge of ice to her voice, "There's something I have to deal with tonight, since its the last night for a waxing moon... tomorrow I'll explain everything, 'kay?" Will nods, and drags Bill up before he can even open up his mouth.

Several hours later, in the depths of slumber, both Bill and Will are woken by a massive thumping below them. Will was the first to wake, but that was quickly followed by Bill, who Will shook awake. "Did you hear that?" Will asks, "Sounds like someone's breaking into our shack!" Bill nods, and reaches underneath his bed to pull out a poker and a pair of brass knuckles. Tossing Will the heavy iron poker, he puts on the brass knuckles and motions Will to follow.

"I figured with her warning us we should be prepared for anything..." he states, slowly creeping down the stairs, "Whatever it was that dismembered those creepy wax dolls, whether it was your 'replica' or something else, she seemed to think it was still in there." Bill and Will both walk up to the door, where the chair sat abandoned by their houseguest, and Mabel nowhere to be seen.

Inside Mabel was dealing with her own problems, namely the beast that sat alone in a circle of candles, unmoving but smirking evilly at her. "Candles, when their wick runs out and the wax melts all the way, I will get to you Shooting Star," he states, looking at her like a wolf sizing up a nice, juicy lamb, "What will you do then, star child? Chop me to pieces with that axe?" He laughs, and Mabel stares at the monster before her, her cold, dead stare chilling the room as she waited patiently for the morning to come.

"You won't be harming them," she states plainly, "Dipper told me I should be watching them, but I never thought you would be doing the same... Cipher." At the mention of his name, his irises seemed to glow an unearthly red, as he chuckled at her.

"The Pine Tree is still keeping an open flame for me then.. oh wait, no, that's you!" he then broke out into hysterics at his own joke, and Mabel almost breaks her facade of calmness while in the same room as this beast. Thankfully she wouldn't have to wait much longer, as the sun was nearly going to rise soon. Suddenly she heard movement on the other side of the door, and she locks eyes with Cipher as she hears the tumblers click. His grin is massive, revealing inhuman fangs locked behind lips of wax. The door opens, and the Syfer twins stumble into the parlor. In their wake a gust of wind blows, as dust settles over the candles which causes a few of them to flicker and blow out.

In that moment, which was all the monster needed, Mabel swings her axe forward toward Cipher, though its in vain as he dodges her attack. In that moment he manages to grab her extended elbow and crack bone as he slams a fist and bends her arm at a nearly unnatural angle. Bill and Will both look up in horror as they see their triplicate standing above them, having just attacked Mabel and harming her in almost the blink of an eye. Before Will could even start screaming, Bill had jumped up and tackled the wax facsimile, surprising him and landing them both in the remaining candles. Cipher's head had gotten close enough to the flames, and Bill was quickly tossed backwards and off of the wax duplicate, when Cipher got up to face the twins.

Bill didn't even hesitate to grab Will and run towards the window, opening it and pushing his twin onto the shingles. Before Bill can even shut the window, the wax figure with murderous intent in his eyes, reaches through and attempts to grab Bill's arm. With a few hectic punches, the arm is successfully broken off, but it still tightly grips Bill's arm. Scrambling up the roof after Will, he manages to reach the open rooftop ledge just by the chimney. He barely dodges a swinging axe as he rights himself, and he quickly loses the brass knuckles for Will's poker. Swinging wildly, he aims for wherever the cursed wax figure should be, and hopes he hits.

Clashing, axe against poker, Bill stares down his evil, red double with intense, burning hatred. "You think you're so tough kid, protecting that weakling, drawing me out here away from Shooting Star?" Cipher states, parrying against Bill, "First when those wax dummies tried to kill me, mistaking me for one of you bozos, I made sure they didn't do it again by dismembering them." He grins and eyes Will just beyond Bill's shoulder. "Hey doe eyes, did you ever wonder why she suddenly showed up out of nowhere?" he asks the blue haired twin, "She planned on watching both of you, keep you from sticking your noses where it...doesn't.. BELONG!" With a final strike, Cipher stands victoriously over Bill, readying the final blow. "So guess what I get to do, since you did exactly what she wanted to prevent?" he chuckles, madness glinting off his eyes, "I get to KILL-"

The poker slamming into his head from below took Cipher by surprise, causing him to release the axe, jsut so he could keep his head on straight. Bill looks up in surprise at his brother, Will, who is breathing hard with trembling hands holding the fireplace poker. "You know what, 'Kill'," Will states, shakily, "I have to say, monologuing after letting us lure you out here, not your best moment for a cold-blooded killer..." Kill looks up from the rooftop in surprise, at the kid who stood up to him, before his eyes go wide. The sunlight slowly is raising above the roof of the mystery shack, and Kill turns around to see the sun rising higher and higher.

"Outsmarted by a pair of nitwits, who don't even know the truth? No!" Kill shouts, struggling to get up off of the rooftop, already melting in the morning sun, "You can't silence me, I'll be back Bill, Will, you can't keep your nightmare-" With a final stroke downwards, Will caves in his cursed creation's skull, looking down at the pooling wax on the rooftop.

"You know Bill, I'm beginning to see why you called wax figures creepy," Will states, eyes full of terror and observing the scene below him, "Let's go check and see if Mabel needs a doctor..." Bill nods and heads back down, though Will pauses for a moment. He looks out towards the beautiful sunrise of gravity falls, his crystal blue eyes flecked with red in the sunlight. He blinks, and begins heading back down into the shack.

* * *

 _Sometime Later..._

"Do they know anything?" Dipper asks, his civil war era military coat pulled closer around his frame, "About Cipher, about-" Mabel shakes her head, and Dipper smiles in relief, pulling down the bill of his cap over his face. "Good, the less they know, the better off they'll be," Dipper states, "At least until we get that Third Journal back from Bill." Mabel nods, and leans into her brothers shoulder, who hugs her tightly towards him in response.

"I don't even understand how Cipher manifested in that Wax Figure," she states, looking up at her brother with fearful eyes, "Will said he made him from the remains of Abraham Lincoln's wax, but that means he couldn't possibly be alive..."

"Because once a wax figure melted, it should have lost the curse," Dipper finishes for her, "Cipher is tricky like that, he knows the twins are in Gravity Falls now, he knows we're protecting them..." He blinks his hot pink and icy blue eyes, looking out over the newly christened 'Zero G' Town. Soos had done wonders fixing up the remains of the old town, made it livable again despite all the monster did to tear their lovely little town apart all those- A long, time ago. "He wants them, for what reason I don't exactly have a clear reason yet, but they seem to be important to him..." he states, and Mabel nods in return, "Keep watch over them, and I'll begin informing the others that we might need to start making preparations, if he starts making moves again..."

"I gotcha' Bro-Bro!" Mabel says, saluting, "Alonsy!" With a twirl, she jumps off of the water tower they had situated themselves on, and begins to float ethereally down to the ground. "See ya later Dip-Dop!" she shouts to her brother from the ground, "Keep it real!" Mabel skips into the forest, leaving Dipper to his thoughts.

As he turns to leave the water tower himself, he pauses and looks into what other observers would see as empty air. "Be careful, Mason," this ethereal, cosmic Dipper states, "Not everything is what it seems in these other realities the Axolotl is showing you; Bill is just as much a threat here, as he is else when and elsewhere." He smiles and waves his hand. "Hope you find whatever it is you're looking for!" he says cheerily, "And don't trust anyone!"

* * *

Dipper gasps, as he pulls away from that strange reality, his heart beating fast and unable to catch his breath. "Hot Belgian Waffles!" he states in response, turning his gaze towards the Axolotl, "What was that?" The Axolotl merely laughs at Dipper's response.

"In a reality such as this one, you are in fact a guardian with great power, essentially a version of reality where the Zodiac and Bill are reversed," the Axolotl responds, "Where Bill is mortal, your duplicates are actually beings of pure energy, and as this Dipper showed you, as nigh omniscient as Bill on the occasions I do not obscure their vision of you." Dipper merely reflected on all this, as he waits for the next reality to come.

 _B/N: Euua ynuarj royzkt Sgyut, ck cuarjt'z cgtz eua zu zxayz sk glzkx grr. Znuamn O u cutjkx nuc Qorrogs sgtgmkj zu otnghoz zngz cgd lomaxk..._


	5. The Ocean that Rocked the Cradle

**A/N: I do not own Twin Pi- I mean, Gravity Falls, I do not own Gravity Falls...**

 **And don't forget to keep your eyes peeled for a hidden Cipher, that may just be important...**

* * *

"What are you having me look for Axolotl?" Dipper asks, as he waits on the floating beanbag chair, "You've shown me all these wonderful alternate realities, but I don't understand why..." Dipper pushes off of the beanbag chair and floats in the air, suspended by the lack of gravity. The Axolotl closes its eyes for a few moments, long enough for Dipper to assume he was avoiding the question.

"Think of your world in the frame of music, tone, pitch, and range," the Axolotl says, "Your reality, made up of these various alternate dimensions, are conformed by design into a lattice." As Dipper watches, a lattice appears before his very eyes, in the form of a Tonnetz diagram. Each lattice has various symbols representing the worlds he had seen, with various versions of himself or others in pictogram form. "Your worlds are connected by similar events, occurrences, people, even ideas, that make up a near perfect match to your neighboring realities," the Axolotl states, as unfamiliar music begins to play out on the diagram, "Yet variation in the lattice, can result in drastic changes that reverberate into more than one dimension..."

The music tones change, creating a jumbled mess of sound that echoes loudly in Dipper's ears. "A way for balance to be restored is needed in use of this musical allegory, like a tuning fork correcting pitch, before the cacophony disrupts the harmony," The Axolotl opens its eyes as it speaks, and looks towards Dipper, "You, Dipper Pines, are a resident of one of three such versions of your reality that are stable enough to allow you to act as a 'Tuning Fork'; allowing beings such as myself to make necessary corrections if need be." The Axolotl uses its tail to poke the lattice, and the harsh sounds become serene once more.

Dipper is in awe at this, and eagerly wishes to ask more questions, before he feels the familiar pull of another Dimension coming into his view.

* * *

Dipper, Soos, and Mabel are all sitting on the couch, watching the televison and enraptured in the current program. "The Tiger was badly inured in the explosion, but we repaired him with a fist," the TV narrates, showing a Tiger on the screen, as an extra appendage appears to have been sewn onto the side of the tiger. Soos and Mabel cheer along with Dipper, as the Tiger punches itself in the face. "Tiger Fist!" the Narrator announces, "...Will return after these messages."

As they all get excited over the commercial break, Soos breaks through the main conversation as he recognizes the upcoming commercial. "Hey, look," Soos states, "It's that commercial I was telling you guys about!"

The three turn to the television which shows on-screen an actor, crying fake tears. "Are you completely miserable?" an unseen narrator states. The Actor looks up, while still crying.

"Yes!" they bawl out, before resuming their crying.

"Then you need to meet..." the voice over continues, dropping in volume to a whisper, "Pacifica." Suddenly the screen shows a flock of Peacocks showing their feathers and calling out.

"Pacifica?" Mabel asks in confusion, adjusting her hat. The commercial cuts to an outline of a woman standing proud, a mystery symbol at body level, with her name underneath.

"What makes her so special?" Dipper asks, raising an eyebrow.

"She's a psychic," the voice over states.

"Aroo?" Dipper states tilting his head, his bangs exposing his birth mark.

"So don't waste your time with other so-called 'men of mystery'," the voice over states,as a picture shows up on the television. The photo shows a man reaching out his hand towards whoever took the picture, anger reflecting in his cracked glasses, as he seems to be reaching for something in his back pocket. Suddenly it's stamped with the word "Fraud" in big, red letters, while the colored picture is grayed out. "Learn about tomorrow, tonight at Pacifica's Tent of Telepathy!" The screen changes, and so does the voice over.

" _Voidwhereprohibited,noC.O.D.'saccepted,_ " The disclaimer states in hyper fast speed, " _ThiscommercialdoesnotackowledgeFordPinestwelvePHD' ._ "

"Wow, I'm getting all curiousy inside!" Dipper states, as Mabel looks at him with confusion.

"Well, don't get too 'curiousy'," Ford states with air quotes, "Ever since that sham Preston and his daughter rolled into town, I've had nothing but trouble."

* * *

 _Ford is driving into town to pick up supplies, before noticing an empty parking spot. Smiling to himself he makes to pull into the spot, before the massive shadow of a hot pink tour bus rolls over him, and he swerves to miss that giant taking his spot. "Preston!" Ford shouts, standing out of the 'Stanley-mobile' and shaking it at the bus._

* * *

"Well, is she really psychic?" Dipper asks Ford.

"I think we should go and find out," Mabel responds. At this Ford put his foot down.

"Never!" Ford states, crossing his arms, "You're forbidden from patronizing those charlatans!" He turns away from them and goes back into the kitchen. "No one that lives under my roof is going to be found underneath that... that... Pacifica's!" he calls out from the kitchen. Dipper and Mabel turn to each other, a smile on both of theirs.

"Do tents have roofs?" Mabel asks.

"I think we just found our loophole...literally!" Dipper states with a silly grin, holding up a loop of string, "Mwop mwop!" The twins look to Soos and prepare to pester him for a ride over to the tent. The scene cuts back to the TV, and Preston's voice-over.

"So come down soon, folks," he states, as the scene highlights the Tent of Telepathy against the night sky, "Pacifica is expecting you."

 _\\\\\\\\\\-_

 _Cut to Theme Music_

 _\\\\\\\\\\\\-_

* * *

The snow crunches under Mabel's thick boots as she hops out of Soos truck. She hugs her tan jacket closer to her, covering up the white t-shirt with the blue pine tree on it. Dipper manages to hop out next, wearing nothing but his shorts and long sleeved shirt over another shirt, and a thin jacket he grabbed from the Mystery Museum Gift Shop's lost and found that Grunkle Ford had made him browse for better winter clothing. Soos followed in earmuffs, a fluff-lined, green parka, and the T-Shirt Dipper had made him for the Mystery Museum, with its accidental backwards question mark and all.

As they move towards the tents entrance, Mabel takes note of the throngs of people crowding to get in. She especially notes the well dressed businessman in a black, winter overcoat, his hair a ashy brown and his mustache is neatly trimmed. "Step right up folks," Preston speaks, "Put your money in Pacifica's psychic sack!" From what Mabel can hear through the crowd, they are all muttering positive things about the sack being helpful to the act. She also notes them placing money into it, but they slip in without much fuss.

"Whoa, it's like some bizarro version of the Mystery Museum!" Mabel states in awe, "Look, they even have their own Soos!" Mabel points to a maintenance worker who looks suspiciously like Soos, though his name tag reads 'Deuce'. Soos glares while munching on his snack, which he had bought from the food cart.

"It's starting!" Dipper enthusiastically states, moving to get a seat, "It's starting!" They find some seats, just as the curtains are about to rise.

"Let's see what this charlatan looks like," Mabel states, slightly skeptical in her tone. As the lights dim slightly, and curtains open to reveal a blonde girl in a purple dress with panel skirt, sectioned in black and purple and showcasing phases of the moon, and a black caplet held together with a purple bolo tie.

"Hello America!" Pacifica states to the cheering crowd, "My name is Li'l Pacifica." She curtsey's and waves to the adoring crowd. Suddenly she claps her hands, and a pair of Peacocks slink out from under her dress, as the crowd cheers and the peacocks preen.

"That's Ford's mortal enemy?" Mabel asks.

"But she's so... adowable!" Dipper states, his eyes beaming at the beautiful girl on stage.

"Ladies and gentlemen, it is such a gift to have you here tonight!" Pacifica announces to the assembled crowd, "...such a gift." She suddenly creases her brow and puts a hand to her temple. "I have a vision," Pacifica states, as she opens her eyes to the waiting crowd, "I predict that you will soon all say, ' _aww_ '." Pacifica suddenly strikes a pose, blowing a kiss out to the audience, causing the crowd to "aww". Mabel merely raises her eyebrows in disbelief, while Dipper looks excited.

"It came true!" Dipper states in awe.

"What?" Mabel states in disbelief towards her brother, "I'm not impressed."

"You're impressed!" Dipper states. Mabel shushes her brother, before turning her focus back to the stage.

"Hit it Father!" Pacifica states, pointing to Preston. As Preston begins to play a killer show tune medley, while tickling those ivory keys, Pacifica began to sing and dance.

" _Oh, I can see, what others can't see_  
 _It isn't some sideshow trick, it's innate ability_  
 _Where others are blind, I'm futurely inclined_  
 _And you too could see, if you were widdle ol' me!_  
 _Come on, everybody, rise up! I want you all to keep it going!_ "

The crowd, including Soos and the mystery twins, rises. "Wha- How did she?" Mabel doesn't know why she claps along with the beat, but she knows she can't consciously stop it.

"Keep it going!" Pacifica sings, " _You wish your son would call you more!_ " An old woman with a cat on her lap nods, and the cat meows. Pacifica turns to another in the crowd.

 _I sense that you've been here before_

Sheriff Durland is wearing a shirt with Pacifica's face on it, and carrying more Lil Pacifica merchandise in his arms. "Aw shucks, what gave it away?" he asks in a thick accent.

"Come on!" Mabel merely groans, and looks towards the stage, as Pacifica turns their way.

" _Something tells me you're real chipper,_ " Pacifica sings, grabbing Dipper's chin and staring into his eyes for a second, " _How about you smile for me Dipper?_ "

"How'd she do that?" Mabel wonders, as Dipper blushes from the contact with her silken gloves. He brushes his hand through his hair, covering back up his birthmark.

" _So welcome all ye... to the Tent of Telepathy_ ," she sings, giving jazz hands to the crowd, " _And thanks for visiting... widdle ol' me!_ " As Pacifica finishes her song, she's just slightly panting, with a glint of sweat on her brow, while the crowd cheers wildly as stage fireworks and a sign that's her name in neon lights comes down from the ceiling. "Oh...oh my goodness," Pacifica says smiling, before taking a hidden bottle of water out and taking a sip, "Thank you! You people are the real miracles!" The crowd cheers, before slowly shuffling back out into the cold, winter afternoon.

"Man, that kid's an even bigger fraud than Grunkle Ford said," Mabel states, "If her father makes her do all that to bring in money..." Dipper stuck out his tongue and walked n front of his sister as they went to Soos' car.

"Oh, come on!" Dipper responds, "Her dance moves were amazing, they were graceful!" He turns and picks up some snow, forming it into artillery between his hands. "And did you see her hair?" Dipper asks, before throwing it up towards a high, snow covered branch, which knocks some snow off, "It was like, woosh!" Mabel smiles, before grabbing some snow and sprinkling it on her twins' head.

"You're too easily impressed," Mabel states, before she runs away and hops in Soos' truck, before Dipper gets back at her. He chases her off, and Soos just minds his own business, chuckling all the while.

Dipper, Soos, and Mabel all got into his truck, and went back to the Mystery Museum. Pacifica pulls back from the tent entrance, steam blowing from her breath as it comes in contact with the cold winter air. She didn't know why her heart felt funny, but that kid with the shooting star on his shirt just caused her ears to ring. She didn't know why, but she needed to see more of him, and soon.

* * *

The doorbell rings, and before Ford can even call out for someone to get it, Dipper is already up and walking. "I'll get it!" he states, as he does just so. Opening the door, Dipper suddenly blushes when his eyes land on a tall head of blonde hair. Leading his eyes downwards, he finds Pacifica Pleasure standing underneath that mop of hair, a purple winter coat over her to keep the cold out, and a smile on her face.

"Why, hello there Dipper!" Pacifica states, her glossed lips sparkling in the sunlight. Dipper opens his mouth to speak, but finds himself swallowing instead.

"I-It's 'wittle ol' y-you!" the words stumble out of Dipper's mouth, as he tugs at his shirt collar. After a moment of silence, Pacifica speaks up again.

"Yeah, my song's quite catchy- heheh," she laughs nervously, before brightening up, "Now, I know we haven't formally met, but after yesterday's performance, I just couldn't get your laugh out of my head." She blushes a bit, as Dipper realizes she was expecting him to say something.

"You mean this one?" he states, before starting to wheeze and laugh obnoxiously. Pacifica grimaces ever so slightly, but pats Dipper on the shoulder.

"Oh, what a delight!" she responds, "Now, when I saw you in the audience, I said to myself, 'Now there's a kindred spirit! Someone who appreciates the sparkly things in life!'" Dipper smiles, then remembers something and rummages in his back pocket.

"Where did I put it..." Dipper mumbles to himself, before his eyes light up with joy, "Ah ha! Here." He holds out a glittering sticker from his pocket, a star very similar to the one on the Tent of Telepathy, but with more glitter and less occultism.

"Enchanting, utterly enchanting!" Pacifica says, accepting the sticker graciously and pocketing it in her purse. Suddenly Dipper notices how Pacifica was shaking in the cold air, and he looks behind him to see if Ford was nearby.

"Come on in, I didn't mean to be rude!" Dipper states, as he lets her pass him by and enter into the entryway, "It's quite cold outside, Grunkel Ford must be downstairs going over the finances, and I wouldn't want a you to get frostbite out there!"

"Why I appreciate your hospitality, and I don't want to cause you any hassle with your- Grunkle," she states, "Honestly, I know Ford's no fan of my father, but I still don't see how someone so business minded can't handle a little competition..." She smiles, and puts a hand to her chin. "How about we step away from here, and chat a bit more," she states, "Perhaps in my dressing room?"

"Are there going to be Peacocks?" Dipper asks, his eyes wide, "I thought you looked so amazing in that dress, and when those peacocks showed up...Blam!" He knuckles Pacifica's shoulder softly, but the girl tenderly rubs the spot where he hit, laughing just a bit in return.

* * *

The inside of Pacifica's dressing room was more elegant than he could have imagined. He was in awe of the lines of dresses and make-up that rivaled stores he had seen his mom take him into when they went shopping, but it was also the mirrors and the lights that had him captivated. "Do you see something you like?" Pacifica asks, walking into the room ahead of him, before turning back towards Dipper, her skirt twirling out around her, "Cause I do..."

"What?" Dipper laughs clueless to her meaning, as his eyes travel around the whole room. They stop when he notices the scene crafted onto the ceiling. "Actually, I do see something I like," Dipper states, causing Pacific to blush at his candor statement, "Is that where you got the inspiration for your dress?" Dipper is pointing upwards, and Pacifica follows his arm to the decorations hanging up on her ceiling.

"The phases of the moon?" she asks, as she looks up at the circular diagram stuck to the center of the room, "I always had a fascination with stars and constellations when I was littler, but while I haven't really given it much thought while I was on tour, you could say it was what inspired my designs..." She turns to Dipper and smiles, as she takes his hands and leads him into her room. "Let me show you those peacocks," she states with a laugh, "I think one of them was molting recently..."

* * *

When Dipper walks back into the Mystery Museum he notices Mabel absorbed in her book, and he decides to take advantage of the opportunity. "Rawwr!" Dipper yells, dangling a peacock's feather over Mabel's head.

"Whoa, where have you been?" Mabel asks, "And where did you get that peacock feather from, they aren't native to Oregon..." Dipper smiles in return.

"I know, cool right?" holding up the feather to the light, Dipper admires it glisten, "I was hanging out with my new pal Pacifica; she's one swingin' gal!" Mabel merely frowns at the mention of Pacifica's name.

"Dipper, I don't trust anyone who's hair is bigger than their head," Mabel responds. She sets her book down and crosses her arms to look at Dipper.

"Oh, leave her alone!" Dipper responds, slightly annoyed, "You're just jealous cause you don't get to do girly things; maybe if you asked her, she'd lend you some make-up or one of her cool dresses!" Mabel scoffs at Dippers insinuations, and rolls her eyes towards her brother. "Besides, you get to do cool stuff with Soos all the time!" Dipper responds, "You're more of a tomboy than you are a girly-girl."

"Fine, maybe I'm not a girly girl, but you don't want to do anything with me when I feel like it," Mabel responds, "And I don't do 'tomboyish' stuff with Soos all the time..." Suddenly Soos enters the room, and he points towards Mabel.

"Hey dude, you ready to blow up these hot dogs in the microwave one by one?" he states, "Eh, eh, ehhhhhh?" Mabel hops up out of the chair and jumps for joy.

"Am I!" Mabel states, following Soos back into the kitchen. Dipper merely sighs rolling the peacock feather through his thumb and forefinger, while listening to Mabel and Soos chanting from the kitchen.

"One-at-a-time!" they chant, "One-at-a-time!"

* * *

On top of a warehouse Dipper and Pacifica sit above the dusty, winter landscape, as fresh powder blows across the hills, having snowed in the early morning hours. Dipper pulls the scarf he had crocheted closer to himself, while Pacifica snuggles closer to Dipper. "Wow, the view from your family's factory is nuts!" Dipper states, trying to start some small talk, "It's a good thing we both brought our-"

"-Opera glasses!" they both announce together, as they look towards each other through the devices. Dipper sighs, as he looks down towards the city.

"Dipper, when I'm up here looking down on all those little people, I feel like I'm queen of all I survey," she sighs, looking up into Dipper's eyes, "I guess that makes you my king!" Dipper chuckles nervously at that, and scratches the back of his head.

"What?" he giggles nervously, "You are being so nice to me right now, quit it!" He taps her lightly on the shoulder once more.

"I can't quit it," she says, brushing off that shoulder, and clutching her chest, "I am speaking from the heart..." Dipper looks at her a little confused.

"From the where-" Dipper gulps, "-now?"

"Dipper, I've never felt this close with anyone," she states, scooting over until she's practically leaning on Dipper, "So, so close." She draws little circles on Dipper's chest and giggles.

"Look, Pacifica, I um..." Dipper states, scooting away a bit while blocking her from getting any closer, as she tries to pet his hair, "I like you a lot, but let's just be friends..." Pacifica draws a hand back in recoil, like she had been bitten by a snake, but she composes herself.

"At least just give me a chance," Pacifica states, "Dipper, wll you do me the honor of going on a date with me?" She pouts just a little bit, curling a stray strand of her hair as she, before smiling at him.

"A play date?" Dipper asks, his voice betraying his hope to keep it just that.

"Mmnn," Pacifica hums, shaking her head.

"A shopping date?" Dipper tries again. He gulps when she shakes her head again in the negative.

"Mmnn," she says, drawing a little bit closer to Dipper, "It will just be one date, I swear on my lucky bolo tie..." She puts her hand on the aforementioned article of clothing, clasped just above her neckline.

"Ummm..." Dipper states, sweating just a little bit, despite the cooling breeze, "Okay, then... I guess..." Pacifica squees, and hugs Dipper before he can react.

"Dipper Pines, you have made me the happiest girl in the world!" Pacifica states.

* * *

Dipper and Mabel are both playing a game, as Dipper is worriedly ranting his confusion to his twin sister. "It's not a date-date, it's just, you know, I didn't want to hurt her feelings," Dipper states, "And so I figured I'd throw her a bone." Mabel sighs, and turns to Dipper.

"Dipper, girls don't work that way," she states, "She's going to fall in love with you." Dipper nervously laughs off his sister's words.

"Yeah right," Dipper scoffs, "I'm not that lovable..." Dipper then focuses intently on the game, as he shoots Mabel's avatar. "Kaboom!" Dipper shouts, "Yes!" Mabel sighs and looks towards Dipper.

"Okay, we agree on something here," she responds, as Dipper gloats on. Suddenly the doorbell rings, and Dipper goes to get it. As he opens the door, a massive horse bursts through it at first chance.

"Ahhh!" Dipepr screams, until he notices Pacifica in riding gear on the back of the stallion. She quickly offers him a sparkly bow tie and a hand.

"A night of amazement awaits, m'lord!" she states.

"Oh boy," Dipper states.

* * *

Pacifica took Dipper to an restaurant with an aquatic theme, and they were sat at a booth together. "I can't believe they let us bring a horse in here," Dipper says, nodding to the horse which munched on hay nearby and lapped from the fountain. Pacifica merely giggled, before snapping for the waiter's attention.

"Well, you see Dipper, people have a hard time saying no to me," she states, as the trembling waiter with a horrible french accent comes to their table, "Garcon, the finest sparkling grape juice for the both of us, and... eh, eh eh, Jean Luc, what did we say about eye contact?" The waiter looks away, as he finishes up their order.

"Of course, mademoiselle Pleasure, how could eh forget my manners?" he states, "Ze order, she will come right away, toot sweet, yes, yes..." The waiter quickly walked away from the two, leaving them alone in uncomfortable silence, or so it felt for Dipper.

"I- er- I've never seen so many forks!" Dipper states, trying to fill the void, "And water with bubbles in it? Ooh lala, oui oui!" Pacifica giggles at Dippers attempt to make small talk.

" _Parlez vous francais_?" she asks in response, leaning forward on the table and batting her eyelashes at her date. Dipper gulps, not knowing what she responded to him with.

"I have no idea what you're saying..." he admits, which earns another chuckle from Pacifica. Just then the waiter returns with their grape juice, and Dipper couldn't be more relieved.

* * *

Back at the shack, Ford just received the afternoon copy of the Gravity Falls Gossiper, and he nearly spit out his coffee when he read the headlines. "Mabel, Soos, Robbie!" he calls out, until he finds them clustered around the couch watching a television show, "What is this?" The three get a good look at the paper, and Ford hands it off to Mabel. "What the jackal is Dipper doing in the paper next to that charlatan's daughter?" he asks. Robbie grabs the paper from Mabel's hands, and laughs at the horrible picture showing Dipper covering his face from the flashes of light the camera had probably given off.

"Oh, yeah, it's like a big deal," Robbie states, "Wendy told me that everyone's talking about Pacifica's and Dippers big date tonight." Ford gasps at that.

"WHAT!?" Ford exclaims, "That little shyster is dating my great nephew?" Soos takes the paper from Robbie and scans the headlines.

"I wonder what the new name will be for the power coupe," he states in awe, "Dippica? Pacifiper? *gasp* Dipcifica?" Ford frowns at Soos' theatrics, and makes for his coat and keys.

"I didn't know!" Mabel states, taking the paper back from Soos, "I didn't hear about itand plus, I told him not to!" Ford renters the room, fully dressed in winter gear and keys in his six digited hands.

"Well, this charade ends tonight!" Ford states, "I won't let that penny pinching skunk profit off of my great nephews predicament, and I'll give him apiece of my mind about his exploiting his own daughter for money!" He angrily slams the door, and Mabel, Robbie, and Soos look on in awe.

"Dude, wouldn't it be funny if that was a closet, and he had to come back out again and go out the real door?" Soos states before he walks over to the door and opens it up, "Nope. Real door."

* * *

By the tie the Stanley-mobile had pulled into Preston's front yard, Ford Pines was halfway out of his car and heading for the door. Knocking on the door, Stanford pines taps his foot as he glances around his enemies main base. "Preston, you chauvinist!" Ford yells out, "Open up!" He looks around and notices a sign on the door that says 'Pardon this Garden', and he grows impatient hearing shuffling coming from inside the house. "I will pardon NOTHING," Ford calls out angrily crossing his arms. Suddenly the door swings open, and the smell of cigar smoke and scotch waft out into the cold winter air, circling around a head of ash brown hair.

"Stanford Pines to what do I owe this... unexpected visit?" Preston 'Pleasure' asks his rival, "Surely you haven't come to admit you've been beat by my superior place of business..." He smirks as he looks over Ford's semi disheveled appearance he had become on the angry drive over.

"Move over Preston, I'm here for my great nephew," Ford says, brushing snow off of his feet and onto Preston's entryway and stepping inside, "Now where is he and Pacifica?" He notices the glint in Preston's eyes, but he is too early to react.

"Well, I haven't seen the boy or my girl around, but since you're here, you must come in for a drink," Preston states, walking further into the living room, "I'm afraid all the scotch is gone, but I'm sure I can offer you some imported, Columbian coffee..." Ford is wary of Preston's game, but he won't refuse a warm cup of imported coffee. Ford watches Preston retreat into the kitchen, and he takes the time to look over the living room. His eyes land on a peculiarly placed painting on the far wall of the living room, of a Llama against a mountain backdrop.

"Some piece of art you got here, Preston," Ford begrudgingly admits, "Did you fleece it from one of your 'donors'?" Preston comes back in, holding a bowl of sugar and a cup of coffee, before passing it off to Ford to observe the painting.

"Ah, no, you see I actually woke up one morning with that Llama painting wrapped up in neat packaging and delivered to my front door," Preston responds, "I looked to see if someone had just dropped it off, but all I heard where the sounds of birds and the faint twinge of banjo music lingering in the air..." He blinks, then turns back t Ford with a smile. "You know, speaking of my Pacifica and your Dipper, I've been hearing how they, well how do I put this?" Preston says, "They seem to be 'singing in harmony', so to speak." Preston states, leading Ford into the kitchen.

"Uh, yeah, and I'm against it," Ford states, quirking his brow and sipping his coffee. Preston merely chuckles and straightens up a stray pillow cushion.

"No no no," Preston states, shaking his head like Ford's response was the funniest thing he's ever heard, "I see it as a great business opportunity; yes, the Mystery Museum and the Tent of Telepathy..." Preston waves his hands in the air as he puts an arm on Ford's shoulder. "We've been at each other's throats for far too- let me get that-" Preston states, ripping off a picture of Ford from the dartboard, "-we've been at each other's throats for far too long, don't you agree?" Preston removes his hand from Ford's shoulder, and pulls out a cigar from his pocket to light. "This is our big chance to set aside our rivalry and pool our collective profit, you see," Preston finishes as he fishes for a lighter in his breast pocket. Ford just looks Preston straight in the eye, before turning around and walking back outside into the cold winter night. "Wait!" Preston calls out, "Ford, think of the profits!"

Ford just whirls back on Preston, which causes the other man to freeze in shock at the deadly look in Ford's eyes. "If you think you can just bribe me, like you do every newspaper and television studio to circulate your phony ads, you have another thing coming Preston Northwest," Ford states, "Preston 'Pleasure' is just a stage name for a phony man exploiting the wonders of this magical town, endangering the life of his own daughter with an off copy amulet, that looks like it was made when the copier was low on toner, and you think you can try and get me to join forces with you, all for profits and gain?" He spits on Preston's lawn, and glares back at him defiantly. "It seems Preston Northwest is just as phony as his ancestors," Ford responds, "Maybe if you hadn't lost your fortune all those years ago, the Northwest name could have meant something, but you hide behind your stage name and the pursuit of riches..." He goes for his car, but turns back and looks at the fuming Preston. "Good Night, Preston," Ford states, before driving back to the Mystery Museum.

* * *

"-And so I said,'autograph your own head shot, sir.'" she laughs, while Dipper laughs nervously.

"Yeah..." Dipper draws off, as he touches his lobster with a fork, and it pinches the metal object in return. Pacifica smiles, and scoots a bit more forward in her seat, towards Dipper.

"Dipper, tonight's date was a complete success," she states, before dropping the bomb, "And tomorrow's date promises to top this one in every way!" She giggles giddily, and Dipper's eyes shoot up in confusion.

"Whoa, whoa," Dipper states, "You said just one date, and this was it..." He trails off, as he stares Pacifica in the eye.

"Hark! What a surprise!" Pacifica calls out, ignoring Dipper's response, and pointing away form the table, "A red crested South American rainbow macaw." As she says this, a giant bird lands on Pacifica's outstretched arm. Dipper screams, and grabs his snapping lobster to defend himself. "...two, three, four..." Pacifica states, counting up.

"DIPPER! WILL YOU- ACCOMPANY- PACIFICA- TO- THE BALLROOM DANCE- THIS THURBDAY-" Macaw cries out, before it's shaken a little bit by Pacifica, "THURSDAY!" It then coughs up a letter onto the table, and flies away.

"Oh, so adorable!" a woman from another table states. The Chef smiles as he peers out of the open door.

"Pacifica has a boyfriend!" the Chef says in awe.

"They're expecting us," Pacifica states, "Please say you'll go?" She pouts a little bit, as concern and anxiety crosses Dipper's face.

"Pacifica, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to say-" he starts, but others voices reaches his ears.

"This is gonna be adorable," Tyler Cutebiker states from his seat.

"If he say's no, I'll die of sadness," a little old woman states from her own seat.

"I can verify that will happen," a nearby Doctor states. People begin to chatter, and it al catches up in Dipper's throat. He feels like he's going to-

* * *

Mabel looks up from Journal Three, as Dipper walks in with something in his hands. "Hey, how'd it go?" she asks, as she sees Dipper face dragged down with unhappiness.

"I don't know," Dipper states, a she opens the tank and places the lobster inside of it, "I have a lobster now..." Mabel smirks, and puts down her book all the way, before going to the other end of the couch to face her twin.

"Well, at least its over and you'll never have to go out with her again," Mabel states, pausing as she judges Dipper's silence, "Dipper? It is over right? Dipper?"

"BLAARRGG!" Dipper states, flailing his arms around, "She asked me out again and I didn't know how to say no!" Mabel frowns, but then smiles and decides to tease her brother.

"Like this: no," Mabel responds, smirking.

"It's not that easy, Mabel!" Dipper states, "And I do like Pacifica... as a friend slash little sister, so I didn't want to hurt her feelings!" He begins to pace and rub his hands through his head in exasperation. "I need to get things back where they used to be," Dipepr states confidently. "You know, just friends..."

* * *

In the twilight of the fading sun, one of those romantic horse carriages you would see more in a park, was driven by a cloaked rider and his Clydesdale horse. In the back of the carriage, Pacifica was snuggling up in the crook of Dipper's shoulder. "Carriage in the night! Carriage in the night!" the rider sings more to himself, as the stars sparkle in the night sky,reflecting light off the snowy banks around the half frozen lake.

"Hah, you know I thought dancing was gonna' be the end of the evening, right?" Dipper states nervously, as Pacifica just digs down deeper into his already numb shoulder.

"Don't you want this evening to last, sugarcube?" Pacifica asks, blinking doe eyes up at a frazzled Dipper. Dipper slightly recoils at the sight, trying to pull his way out of her grasp.

"No! I mean yes. I mean I'm always happy to hang out with a friend," Dipper rambles, "Buddy, pal, chum, other word for friend..." Dipper trails off, blushing as he tries to keep his eyes from refocusing on Pacifica.

"Pal?" Pacifica questions.

"I already said pal," Dipper responds, "Uh, mate?" Pacifica beams back at him, her eyes shining with happiness.

"How about soul mate?" Pacifica asks, as fireworks appear above the carriage, writing Dipper's name in the sky with lights.

"Well, you can't say know to that," the driver chuckles to himself, letting his eyes stray to the fireworks display up above, before returning to the horse ahead of him.

* * *

"...I mean, she's so nice but.. I can't keep doing this," Dipper mutters to himself, as Mabel watches him pace the room, "I can't break her heart; I have no way out!" Mabel jumps up and stops Dipper in his tracks.

"Alright, enough is enough," Mabel states, "If you can't break up with Pacifica, I'll do it for you, you clueless sap." Dipper suddenly tackles her in an energetic hug, the vitality once drained out of him, now restored and expressed towards his sister in deep gratitude.

"You will?" he shouts, "Oh, thankyouthankyouthankyou!" Mabel smiles, as she drags her brother off of her and moves to go confront Pacifica.

* * *

Mabel finds Pacifica waiting for Dipper at a booth in the fancy restaurant called The Club. "Oh, Mabel Pines, how are you?" she asks, looking around Dipper's sister expectantly, "Where's Dipper at?"

"Well, um, that's what I'm here to actually tell you-" Mabel states, taking the open seat, "Look, Pacifica, we have to talk about you and Dipper." Pacifica merely folds her hands together and waits for Mabel to continue. "Dipper isn't joining you tonight, he's uh, he doesn't want to see you anymore," Mabel states plainly, "He's kind of weirded out by you, no offense." Pacifica takes this in, then calmly takes a sip of her water on the table.

"So what you're saying is... _you_ -" Pacifica states, her right eye twitching, "-you've... come between _us?_ " She holds back a grimace, but Mabel can tell she's boiling beneath her skin.

"You're not gonna, like, freak out or anything..." Mabel says, "Are you?" Pacifica shakily takes another gulp of her water, before dabbing at her mouth with a silken napkin.

"Of course not," she stays cool and collected, "These things happen. Bygones, you know." Mabel sighs in relief, and shakily rises from her own chair.

"So, okay, cool," Mabel states, as she readies herself to leave, "Then again, sorry girl, but uh, hey, thumbs up. Huh?" She slowly backs away, ignoring the looks the other patrons in the restaurant give her.

"Oh, thumbs up indeed, my friend," Pacifica states venomously, going to clutch the bolo tie and thumb it.

Outside The Club, Dipper is waiting anxiously for his sister to come out the doors, until he finds himself face to face with her. "Wahhh!" he screams in shock before collecting himself, "How'd it go?" Mabel is about to speak, when Dipper interrupts in one long, nervous rant. "Was she mad?" he asked. "Did she try to read your mind with her psychic powers?' Mabel laughs off her brothers anxieties, as they begin their walk back to the Mystery Museum.

"Don't worry Dipper, she's just a regular kid," she insists, "She doesn't have any powers, it's just part of her act."

* * *

In the darkness of her room, the moon above her head glowing lightly in the dim lighting, Pacifica 'Pleasure' Northwest plots. "Mabel Pines, you don't know what you've done!" Pacifica states, grasping her amulet and focusing on it. Suddenly an unlit candle on her dresser begins to levitate, as the lights on her boudoir explode. Suddenly the clothes from her closets begin to levitate, along with other items in her room. "You've just made the biggest mistake of your life!" she states, before everything stops floating and falls back to the ground. Suddenly the rattling of her doorknob could be heard, and Pacifica angrily glares at her father as he sticks his head into her room.

"Pacifica Elise Northwest, clean up your room this instant!" he tells her, before slamming the door closed. Suddenly a dagger made of purely psychokinetic energy, lodges itself in the door frame where Preston's head had been seconds earlier.

"If you didn't hog all the profits and spend them on yourself, I could buy and sell you old man," Pacifica harshly whispers to herself, "If _you_ hadn't lost your fortune, we wouldn't be indebted to that crazy occultist for changing our lives..." Suddenly she feels a burning, searing pain coming from her bolo tie, which causes her to clutch her chest in pain. "Soon, soon-" she grits out, opening one eye to land on the photo tacked to the wall, "Yes, master, you shall have it all..." The picture shows Mabel and Dipper Pines, smiling happily at the camera, until the edges of the photo begin to burn away as if by magic, incinerating the half containing Mabel Pines, until she's barely visible on the burnt photo. "And I shall have my prize," she whispers to herself, "My chipper little Dipper..."

* * *

At the Mystery Museum, Dipper and Mabel both play around with Soos, before the phone rings. "Your turn!" Dipper states.

"Your turn!" Mabel replies, just a second too late, "Aw rats..." Mabel walks over to the phone as it rings, picking it up and answering it. "Hello?" she asks the person on the other end of the line.

"Shandra Jimenez, Gravity Falls Gossiper," the voice on the other end responds. Mabel brightens up as she recognizes the voice.

"Oh hey girl!" Mabel says, "Sorry for accusing you of murder last week!" Shandra laughs on the other end of the line.

"Water under the bridge!" Shandra replies, "Say, we want to interview you about whether you've seen anything unusual about the town since you've arrived..." Suddenly Dipper covers his ears, as he hears Mabel squealing from the couch.

"Oh, finally!" Mabel almost screams out, "I thought nobody would ever ask!" She grabs a pen and paper from under the phone. "I have notes and theories!" she exclaims, as she pauses to listen to Shandra's instructions, "uh huh, uh huh... Gopher Road. Tonight? Got it." She hangs up the phone and runs to prepare herself.

* * *

"There," Shandra states, hanging up the phone, "I did your dirty work." She crosses her arms as she swivels her chair to face the other occupant in the room. "Now it's time you pay YOUR end of the bargain!" she states coolly. Suddenly a piece of paper floats to the floor in front of Shandra's desk in her work space. Shandra quickly scrambles out of her chair, losing all composure, to grab the little scrap of writing. "Ha! Toby Determined's phone number!" she states holding it aloft, "Bless you Miss Pleasure!"

* * *

Once Mabel reached 412 Gopher Road, she stood in front of an abandoned looking warehouse overlooking the town. Opening the door, Mabel cautiously looks around and walks inside. "Hello?" she calls out, walking forward into the darkness, "Shandra Jimenez?" Suddenly the door behind her shuts closed, the metal groaning as it does so, and plunging Mabel into darkness. She begins to bang on the doors, hoping she could jar loose whatever was blocking it from opening, when the light in the middle of the warehouse returned.

"Hello friend," Pacifica states pleasantly, practically purring in delight while petting a fluffy llama doll in one arm. She sits on a swivel chair in the middle of the room, and Mabel groans in annoyance once she realizes who it was.

"Uggh,Pacifica," Mabel states, clearly annoyed that she had fallen into her trap. She crosses her arms and awaits the inevitable gloating.

"Mabel Pines," Pacifica states, uncrossing one of her legs and leaning her head onto her right arm, "How long have you been living in this town? A week, two?" She doesn't get a rise out of Mabel yet, so she continues. "You like it here?" she asks, "Enjoy the scenery?" Mabel decides to get to the point.

"What do you want from me, woman?" Mabel asks, wanting to cut through all the posturing and pretentious air.

"Listen carefully, _girl_ ," Pacifica warns, narrowing her eyes towards Mabel, "This town has secrets, the likes of which you couldn't begin to comprehend!" Mabel walks boldly forward towards Pacifica.

"Is this about Dipper?" she questions, "I told you, he's not into you!" Pacifica merely scoffs and gets up from her chair, discarding the doll behind her.

" **LIAR!** YOU turned him against me!" she states, grabbing her amulet and walking towards Mabel, "He was my chip dip, he made me feel..." She bites back tears as she walks forward, but her angry silence gives Mabel pause.

"Uh, you alright man?" Mabel asks. Pacifica blinks back tears, before looking straight at Mabel and focusing. Ina few seconds Mabel was contained in a magenta aura, and lifted up and tossed backwards into a pile of merchandise.

"OW!" Mabel cries out, as she struggles to move up from the cardboard box full of Llama dolls she landed in. Pacifica walks over in front of Mabel and stands above her.

"Reading minds isn't all I can do," she whispers wickedly, just loud enough for Mabel to hear and look up in fear. Suddenly in Pacifica's hand, a magenta dagger of pure, unrestrained energy alights.

"B-but _how?_ " Mabel blubbers out, "You're supposed to be a fake..." Pacifica gives her a crazed looking smile.

"Oh tell me Mabel; is this fake?" she asks, as she plunges the dagger just above Mabel's shoulder and into the packaging behind her. The solid sound of knife tearing cardboard, followed by the gutted llama doll pulled out by Pacifca's removal of the weapon, is all the proof she needs.

* * *

Dipper is sitting outside the Mystery Museum, grabbing pine cones and tossing them as far as he can, between clutching his knees and looking depressed. Suddenly a flannel wearing teen with greasy dark hair walks and sits right next to Dipper, as he skips another pine cone. "How's your aim gettin' buddy?" Robbie asks the twelve year old.

"Robbie, I need some advice," Dipper says glumly, "You've broken up with girls, right?" Robbie laughs and slaps Dipper on the back.

"Oh yeah: Jessie Durham, Elli Hall, Pebbles Davidson..." he begins to list off. He keeps on talking, but Dipper loses interest.

"I don't know what's wrong with me," Dipper mumbles to himself, "I thought everything was back to normal, but I still feel all gross..."

"...Psyche Wirley, Wendy's friend Tambry, oh, that girl with those tattoos..." Robbie continues listing off names.

"Maybe letting Mabel do it for me was a mistake," Dipper reasons, "Pacifica deserves an honest breakup.

"...Danielle Feldman, Michelle Epston... oh, man,I'm not sure I ever broke up with her," Robbie comes to a realization, before scratching his chin, "Maybe that's why she keeps calling me..."

Dipper sits a little taller and makes up his mind. "I know what I've gotta do," Dipper states, "Thanks for talking to me, Robbie." He quickly runs off to get his bike, oblivious to Robbie, who was still listing names.

"Hmm? Oh, sure buddy!" he says, until he hears his phone ring, he pulls it out and checks the name, "And ignore."

* * *

Mabel is running away from psychokinetic knives being tossed her way. "Grunkle Ford was wrong about you," she states as she avoids another knife, "He didn't know just how much of a monster, you _REALLY_ are!" Pacifica merely cries silently, as she tosses and continuously misses Mabel with her knives.

"I didn't have to be your enemy, Mabel, I don't want to force Dipper to be with me, I'm not stupid," Pacifica states through tears, "I'm forced to do this, I'm- _aggghhh_ " She clutches her chest and bolo tie, which is enough leeway for Mabel to grab a baseball bat and charge her. Mabel shouts as she swings the bat, and Pacifica opens her eyes and whips her hand out in front of her. In less then a second her attack is stopped, as Mabel feels her whole body being enveloped in glowing, purple light.

"He's never going to date you, Pacifica!" Mabel shouts, struggling against invisible bonds, "You're acting too cray-cray!" Pacifica looks up at Mabel with fearful eyes, she suddenly stops and just holds Mabel there in midair.

Suddenly the door opens, and Dipper walks into the warehouse. "Pacifica!" Dipper announces, "We have to talk!" Pacifica whirls around, eyes stained by mascara and hot tears, her power still clasping Mabel.

"Dipper?" Pacifica asks, "Nonono, what are you doing here?" Reflexively she closes her fist a little bit tighter, causing the grip on Mabel to do likewise.

"Bro-bro?" Mabel gasps, "Maybe now isn't the best time..." She coughs a bit, as Dipper switches from focusing on Mabel and back to Pacifica.

"I'm sorry Pacifica, I can't be your chip dip," Dipper states, "I needed to be honest and tell you that myself." Suddenly he looks up at Mabel, who is flying in the air. "Pacifica, I need you to put my sister down," he asks, "Please..." Pacifica nearly does so, before the burning sensation courses through her body once more, and she gasps out in pain, before turning rigid. Suddenly the burning glow of the amulet fills the whole room, as Pacifica's hand reaches upwards and begins to crush Mabel once more. "Mabel!" Dipper cries out, "Pacifica let her go!"

"Y-you don't understand..." Pacifica breaks out, in shallow gasps of breath, "I'm not d-doing this-" Dipper moves forward towards Pacifica, unafraid of what was going on.

"Then help me to understand," Dipepr states, "We can still be friends, just let her go."

"Really?" Pacifica whimpers, giving a pained smile, and straining to turn her eyes towards Dipper's warm look, "The a-amulet, I-I c-can't..."

"But I can!" Dipper states, pulling the chain free of her neck, and releasing both Pacifica and Mabel from its grasp. Dipper feels the hot, burning stone in his hand, and the whispers in his head.

"Dipper, _no_!" Pacifica cries out, as she collapses to the floor, "Destroy it, don't listen to it!"

"Ha... heh... he hahahahhahahha!" Dipper mutters, before breaking out into a full out evil laugh, "Foolish girl, not so great and powerful without this now, are you?" His eyes are hollow and filled with purple energy, and as Mabel gets up form the box of toys she fell on, she realizes that Dipper wasn't in control, and it appeared neither had Pacifica been, in reality. Before she could even react, Mabel made up her mind and tackled her brother through the nearest window.

"Dipper!" Pacifica cries out, "Mabel!" As she struggles to get up and see what had happened. looking down through the open window, she notices the twins had fallen safely into a giant snowbank. Rushing down to meet the twins, she sees both twins in a daze, and Dipper still clutching the amulet. Grabbing it out of his hands, Dipper and Mabel both woozily find that Pacifica was now holding the cursed amulet. "That's enough out of you!" she shouts, as she tries to aim for a rock, but misses and lands the piece of jewelry into the snowbank. Beofre Dipper and Mabel can comment on the poor throw, from the hole the amulet made, a shining purple beam of energy shot out and died.

Mabel, Dipper, and Pacifica all look to see whether the amulet had fallen on a hidden rock and cracked, but all they see is a piece of soggy paper sitting in the hole. "What the?" Mabel questions, "What happened to the amulet?" They all look to each other, and they all begin to laugh now that the craziness was over.

"Oh, man, my dad is going to kill me now that I don't have my powers," Pacifica says through tears, "Thank you, Dipper, Mabel, for helping me tonight, but I think we need to give us all some space... I hope we can still be friends next time..." She trudges off into the dark woods, to return home, leaving Dipper and Mabel staring off after her.

"Such a weird girl, isn't she?" Mabel asks her brother.

"Yeah, but maybe there's something there now," Dipper states, "Something different about her... something alive in her now."

* * *

" _NO! NO! NO!_ " a figure states watching through tempered glass the scene with Pacifica, Mabel, and Dipper. Clearing his desk in one broad stroke of rage, he causes his crystal ball to fall to the floor and crack, destroying the enchanted object and ruining it for any further use. "Stanford Pines, I rebuke thee!" he yells in empty air, "The entire Pines' family have now invoked my fury! You will all pay recompense for your transgressions!" The flickering firelight illuminated the study, but cast deep and dark shadows on the walls.

"I see you've taken to one of your rages again, Preston," a platinum blonde haired child voices, adjusting his glasses as he appears from the shadows and into Preston Northwest's study, "And did you get a new word-a-day calendar; it shows!" He smirks towards the boiling Preston Northwest, aggravating his already sour mood. "You know they say blood feuds aren't great for the blood pressure, and the stress on the heart, it's just killer," Gideon Gleeful states, moving a hand to his his chest and the bolo tie at its center, "Like the man who _thought_ he could just steal my property and replicate a cheap knock-off made when the printer was running low on toner..." He inspects his nails and then focuses an extremely sharp look Preston's way. "But let's not drag my father into this, we're talking about your family issues, after all," Gideon states, "You made your daughter wear cursed jewelry that corrupts the soul, and used her to try and regain the fortune wrongly stolen from you..."

"I didn't know about the effects, about how much it would change her-" Preston babbles out, "When I was given that bolo-"

" **SILENCE!** " Gideon commands, which causes Preston to stop and cower from the forcefulness. He looks around the room, and notices the variety of objects and memorabilia connected to the occult and then he notices the waxing seal tipped over on the desk. Gideon walks over to said desk, and picks up the sealer, and dips it in a nearby pot of ink.

"My boy, you'll ruin the-" Preston suddenly finds that he can't move, and notices the faint traces of blue surrounding his body. Unable to talk or anything, he can only watch with trembling eyes as Gideon forcefully pounds the seal onto a fresh sheet of paper. Sweating, he watches as Gideon turns back to Preston, an angry look in his eye.

"My, my, my, what was that about not knowing?" Gideon asks, as he lifts up the fresh sheet of paper, an inky blotch staining it right in the center, "I don't think you're being truthful Preston, and I'll let you off with a single warning..." He snaps, and Preston drops to the floor, trembling as he looks up in fear at Gideon, who pulls something out of the inside of his overcoat and slips the piece of paper inside it. Preston sees a flash of gold and the number two, but suddenly he's met with Gideon's fire lit eyes. "Leave the Pines' family alone; I have my eyes on that peach dumplin' they call Mabel," Gideon says, the unsaid threat glossing his words, "And if I dare see one bruise on your darlin' daughter's skin, no matter where it is, you'll get to see what a Gremloblin can do to your mind, and there's _no_ forgettin' that..."

Preston Northwest merely whimpered, as Gideon Gleeful left in the shadows of the firelight. He wouldn't be getting much sleep that night, not when they came for him either.

* * *

Stirring a black pot, a cloaked figure hums to himself, the symbol of a Crescent Eye falling over his forehead, embroidered on the cloth. "Stirring my soup, stirring my soup," he sings, "It's not percepshrooms, screaming basil, or forest gloop, I'm just stirring my flavorful soup..." Taking a taste of the wonderful broth inside, he removes the Racoon bones from the flavored stew, and then takes a taste of the flavorful meat. "I'm uh just boiling soup under this here Birch tree, just'n like I wanted too," he hums, "It seems the Pentagram, has become a Pentangle, oh well, I'll do with it what I'm able~!" Suddenly the world turns colorless around the pot of soup and the cloaked figure, and laughing is heard coming from all around. "Hehehhe hah!" the figure cackles in agreement, "Soon, master, soon...he he ha..."

* * *

 _D/N: Ccokkaam is gfd Invl, poy me niqsuwx tb luwfq ge nyusl yme Fabqe!_

 _?/N:_

 _REVFXUHG QR PRUH, D IOLSSHG CRGLDF VZDSV OLYHV DQG IDWHV._

 _ZKDW LV D VKRRWLQJ VWDU ZLWKRXW LW'V SHQWDQJOH? ZKDW GRHV LW PHDQ ZKHQ D SHQWDQJOH EHFRPHV WKH VFKRODU, DQG WKH VFKRODU WKH FUHVFHQW HBH?_

 _DQG ZKB WKH OODPD GROOV?_


	6. Zodiaci ab Elementis

**A/N: The following song is "** **Put On Your Sunday Clothes** **" Originally from the 1969 Movie '** **Hello, Dolly!** **', but the version used here is taken from the WALL-E soundtrack. I recommend listening to that version for the experience!**

 _1995, The Past_

 _Out there_  
 _There's a world outside of Yonkers_  
 _Way out there beyond this hick town, Barnaby_  
 _There's a slick town, Barnaby_  
 _Out there_  
 _Full of shine and full of sparkle_  
 _Close your eyes and see it glisten, Barnaby_  
 _Listen, Barnaby..._  
 _Put on your Sunday clothes_  
 _There's lots of world out there_  
 _Get out the brillantine and dime cigars_  
 _We're gonna find adventure in the evening air_  
 _Girls in white in a perfumed night_  
 _Where the lights are bright as the stars!_  
 _Put on your Sunday clothes, we're gonna ride through town_  
 _In one of those new horsedrawn open cars_

 _We'll see the shows at Delmonicos_  
 _And we'll close the town in a whirl_  
 _And we won't come until we've kissed a girl!/..._

The snapping, crackling hiss of the radio turning to static disrupts the quiet evening air. The 'Dawn 2 Dusk' parking lot having been emptied by the days events. Colored lights, neon signs, and electric equipment for serving and storing food and drink shone brightly in the dead of night, left on by the sudden departure of the store owners, and the neglect to turn them off since no one would be using them anytime soon. After all with a double heart attack and death of the beloved store owners, it would be hard for anyone to just up and buy the convenience store now. No one wanted to own a place where two old fashioned, lovable people died, not with the ugly reminders freshly chalked into the tiles behind the register.

 _The lights cast flickering shadows onto the walls, and for a second, one could almost gaze the impossible, a floating triangle wearing a top hat, and an eye at its center. Except the body casting that shadow was more human._

Ma and Pa Duskerton had had powers that he needed. Or at least, Pa Duskerton had a power he needed. Ma Duskerton had been extremely sensitive to the loud music the Boombox had given off, having an affinity to the element of sound, manifesting as hyperacusia, resulting in her untimely death. Pa Duskerton, mistakenly having been confirmed to have an affinity with the elements regarding energy and life by the Elemental Industria, had in actuality been connected to one of the rarer, more valuable sub-elements in the astral category: ectoplasm.

It was exactly what he needed to continue on his quest, an elemental power he could take for himself when the time came. Which led him here, now, after Pa's power manifested an alerted him to its existence. He had to take it, to bind it to himself, before the Astral Commission became aware of the mistake in his Binding ceremony and made the changes to legally recognize his status as a 'Post-Corporeal' Citizen. He couldn't have that now, not with this power so close to his grasp, and the fact Elemental Powers we becoming more and more understood and catalogued in this Age of Electronics, than in the past few millennium classifying people as 'Wizards' and 'Witches'.

Making the necessary adjustments around the chalk outline that once held Pa Duskerton's body, he was done, and his non-corporeal visage was already beginning to manifest. Extending out his hand as a resting place, the glowing gray-pink mass began to mimic the now non-existent neurological system, including eyes, mouth, and even what he assumed was the approximation of hands made from the fleshy mass' tentacle protrusions. As the his glowing eyes finished forming pupils and irises, Pa Duskerton looked at the intruder in his store, and the intruder decided he would say his piece before Pa became aware of what he was.

 ** _Tell me everything you remember…_**

 _Cold, so cold…._  
 _Kids… Teenagers…._  
 _So… Disrespectful…_  
 _Ma… Where's Ma?_

 ** _Don't worry, she'll be joining you soon my friend, soon…_**  
 ** _But continue, how did these Teenagers make you feel?_**

 _Angry, so very angry. They would not stop…_  
 _Stop… loud… loud sounds…_  
 _Disrespectful Teenagers…_  
 _Bad Teenagers… So cold…_  
 _Where's Ma?_  
 _Hurt… They Hurt Ma…_

 ** _Yes, yes they Hurt Ma, and they Hurt You too._**  
 ** _Their loud music hurt you and Ma, how does that make you feel?_**

 _Sad… Hurt… Cold…_  
 _Angry… Very Angry…_  
 _Hurt… Teenagers!_

 ** _Good Pa, good. Ma will be joining you soon Pa Duskerton, just you wait…_**

 _Thank You…_  
 _Ma…_  
 _So cold Ma…_  
 _Where are you?_  
 _So Tired…_  
 _I… sleep… Ma…_

 ** _Sleep now Pa Duskerton, and I will call upon you latter…_**  
 ** _Heh he, ha ha…_**  
 ** _Poor fool, I can't wait to see your face when you learn Ma can't join you…_**  
 ** _Well, at least not in the way you want…_**

 _2012, The Present_

"There it is, fellas!" Wendy Corduroy says amongst her assorted friends and Dipper and Mabel, "The condemned Dusk 2 Dawn!" The twins, Robbie, Thompson, Tambry, Lee, and Nate all stare through the fence at the visage of the crumbling convenience store.

"Ha!" Lee says, while Nate agrees, "Cool!"

"Neato!" Mabel states, slipping her hands through the fence and looking at the creepy building's exterior. Dipper scratches his arms as he looks, and turns to the teens.

"Why'd they shut it down?" Dipper asks, turning back to the rundown building, observing the cracked pavement and the weeds growing through it, "Was it like a health code violation, or-" Nate butts in, scaring Dipper as he shouts.

"TRY MURDER!" he says, half leaping at the scared twelve year old. Robbie laughs, as Lee chuckles and chimes in.

"Some folks died in there," he says, "The place has been haunted ever since!" He chuckles, as Dipper looks on with renewed fear at the building.

"This town has such a colorful history!" Mabel speaks out in her normal, sunny disposition, which still does not help Dipper's jumpiness.

"Wha..." Dipper gulps, "Are you guys serious?" Wendy turns to him and rolls her eyes up into her head while pulling down her eyelids.

"Yeah!" she groans, "We're all gonna die!" She lets go and laughs a bit, before continuing on talking. "Chill out man!" she states, socking Dipper in the shoulder, "It's not as bad as it looks, and besides, with all of our powers combined what are a few ghosts?" The teens begin jumping the fence, Nate lighting his hands on fire and rocketing over the fence, while Lee grabs onto Thompson and Tambry, and teleports through the fence in the blink of an eye. Mabel giggles as her hands pass right through the bars, like they weren't even there, followed by the rest of her. Meanwhile, Wendy's already climbed over the fence and jumped down, while Robbie follows behind her. Dipper swallows and sighs, as he begins climbing up after them, but manages to get stuck on top of the high fence.

"Come on, Dipper!" Wendy calls out, as she watches him struggle to get up and over the edge of the fence.

"Dude, your sister just walked through the fence, why can't you do this?" Robbie complains, as he thumbs over to the other twin, whose whooping and running around in circles as they wait for Dipper.

"Just cause we're twins, doesn't mean we have the same Element!" Dipper calls out, "I just- I just gotta get a foothold..." As Robbie groans, the tall blonde, Lee sighs and begins the short climb.

"Hey you know what. Just... There you go!" He picks Dipper off of the fence and tosses him down feet first, "Ha! S-sorry dude!" Dipper can't tell if he can feel his legs or not, but when he opens his eyes, he realize's he's landed in a small pile of powder snow. Wendy winks, as Dipper gets up and brushes the snow off his pants.

"Great job throwing the kid off the fence, genius!" Nate states, slapping Lee on the back.

"Your mom's a genius.." he bites back, flipping up Nate's hat as everyone starts to head over to the storefront.

"Wow!" Wendy states as she peers through the dusty and grimy window, "This place still looks amazing!" Robbie heads up to the door and jiggles the handle.

"I think it's... it's stuck!" Robbie confirms, as he looks around for something to break a window with. Dipper too looks around, and he notices the dumpster just off to the side.

"Let me take a crack at it!" Dipper announces proudly, as Robbie just scoffs.

"Oh yeah," he mocks, "I can't get in, but I'm sure Junior over here is gonna break it down like Hercules..." Wendy glares at him in response.

"Come on, leave him alone," she warns, "He's just a little kid." Dipper's walked over to the dumpster by now, and sized it up just right.

"Kid, what're you doing?" Tambry asks, taking a few seconds to look away from her cell phone. Dipper jumps onto the dumpster, walks onto the roof and up to the vent shaft. He looks it over, then gives it a solid punch, breaking it off its hinges.

"Go Dipper!" Mabel cheers, "Punch that metal thing!" In seconds Dipper removes the grate and begins to climb inside.

"Hey Dipper, take it easy!" Wendy calls out of concern to the kid. Robbie scoffs and turns to Lee and Nate.

"Who wants to bet he doesn't make it?" Robbie says scoffing once more, but then he shuts up as he hears a rattling noise. Suddenly Dipper opens the door and bows.

"Good call inviting this little maniac!" Lee states, noogieing Dipper's hat as he walks by him, followed by Nate who says, "Your new name is Dr. Funtimes!" Mabel high-fives Dipper as she walks inside, while Wendy punches him in a more friendly way.

"Nice work!" Wendy compliments, as Dipper skips inside after everyone else. Thompson then speaks up as they all head inside.

"Do you guys really think it's haunted?" he asks, while everyone else just laughs.

"Na!" Nate says, "Thompson are you kidding me?" They laugh it of as they begin to explore the store. As the door closes, the sign flips over, as if there was a breeze, no longer saying 'Yes we're open', and flipping over to 'Get lost! We're closed'.

"Whoa man, it's even creepier than I imagined!" Nate states, as he stares around the darkened room. Mabel wipes off a speck of dust from the change slot on the counter, before licking it to taste.

"Yep, it's dust," she announces to the others, "This place clearly gets a healthy amount of sunlight... I'd say it's been closed about seventeen years by the taste of the ultraviolet B levels..." Dipper raises an eyebrow at his twin, but she shrugs her shoulders and merrily skips away. Dipper sighs and turns to the stack of newspapers on the shelf. He wipes off the thick layer of dust and observes the year on the yellowing pages is '1995'.

"Hey dude, where do you think they keep the dead bodies?" Lee asks, before Nate shoves him.

"Shut up man!" Nate responds, before lee and Nate get into a play fight.

"Guys, check it out!" Wendy calls from the far side of the room, as al attention draws upon her standing in front of some light switches, "Do you think these still work?" She flips all three switches, and with the slight hum of electricity, the room changes in the blink of an eye. The slusho machine begins to whirl, the Pitt Cola fountain lights up, the lights come on, and even the lights in the broken down cooler's come on. The teens all begin muttering in awe at the store and its hidden treats, which seem to have survived despite their age.

"Jackpot!" Mabel cries out, as she looks to the shelves of sweet treats and chocolates, and all the Pitt Soda they could have.

"So, what are we gonna do now?" Dipper asks. Wendy smiles at him, before turning to the rest of the group.

"Anything we want!" Wendy announces, as she grabs some snack cakes and begins bunting them at Thompson. After a montage of fun, the kids all meet in the center of the room, as Lee and Nate pop mints into Pit Cola two liters, watching them fizz and explode, to the cheers and enjoyment of everyone. Mabel suddenly runs around the corner of the snack aisle, and comes face to face with a cordoned off display of sweet, sugary treats.

"Oh my gosh! Smile Dip!" she cries out in ecstasy, "I thought this stuff was banned in America!" She grabs a couple of packets and brings it close to her. Dipper follows the sound of her screams, and looks at the police tape covering the display over.

"Maybe they had a good reason..." Suddenly he gets hit in the head by a package of snack food, and he turns to rejoin the teens. Mabel looks between Dipper and the Smile Dip, then between the dip and the dipping stick. She then dips the stick into the snack food and then smiles. Then she pours the whole package of Smile Dip into her mouth.

Meanwhile, Dipper had joined Wendy in raiding a shelf of ice pops from the oddly, still working freezer. Robbie and Nate are off doing something to Thompson, and even Wendy is cheering them on while snacking on ice pops with Dipper. "Thompson!" Wendy cheers on, as Robbie helps Nate stuff ice down Thompson's pants, before she turns back to Dipper, "Dude Dipper, this night is like, legendary!"

"Really?" Dipper questions, scratching the back of his head and chomping off another bit of ice. Wendy nods and turns to the others in the store.

"Just look around," she exclaims, "The guys are bonding..." Dipper watches as Thompson shivers, while Robbie and Nate laugh. "I've never even seen Tambry look up from her phone this long," Wendy states, as Dipper watches Tambry look up at the mention of her name, before Wendy keeps on talking, "Even your sister seems to be going nuts with that Smile Dip." Dipper looks over to his sister, and nearly balks at the fact his sister is surrounded by a glow and shifting through the color spectrum.

"Ugh, maybe I've had too much," Mabel states, looking up, "What do you think?" From Mabel's perspective, she's in a massive valley that continuously changes colors, surrounded by a pair of massive, cartoon-ish dogs that tower over her, while Sev'ral Timez and miscellaneous pop music plays in the background.

"I don't know about you dogz, but aren't we supposed to meet Mabel in eleven episodes?" Deep Chris asks the others, who nod in response to their brother's query, "Well Girl, we'll leave you to your hallucination..." All of a sudden all five boys strike a pose and disappear in puff of logic. Mabel hadn't been listening at all, as a Candy Hound had given her its paw to chew on. Back in reality, the glowlite that was Mabel Pines was chewing nothing but air.

"You know Dipper, I wasn't sure if you could hang wit our crew at first, but you're surprisingly mature for your age!" Wendy proclaims, as Dipper eats his ice cream.

"Yes, yes I am!" he announces proudly, as he smears a bit of ice cream on his face. Suddenly Lee calls out from the group of guys and Thompson.

"Hey guys!" he calls out, "We need more ice!" Lee is shown shaking a bag of ice over Thompson's pants.

"Well don't expect me to make any for you guys!" Wendy calls back, "Go get your own!" Suddenly an idea crosses Dipper.

"I'm on it!" he calls out, as he rushes to the freezer in the back. He takes out a good sized bag of ice, but has the misfortune to look up at the wrong time. Standing above him and the mound of ice, is some sort of cooler monster, because that's all he could think of, staring down the glowing brain with eyes on stalks and hands made from veins and the nervous system. "AAAAHHH!" Dipper screams, as he drops the ice on the lip between the freezer and the store, causing it to burst and scatter to the ground. He quickly slips and falls backwards, slamming the door to the icebox as he does so, trapping the monster within it.

Suddenly the Teens all were behind Dipper, and he looked back to see their worried faces, minus Robbie. "What was that?" Lee asks, "I thought I heard some lady screaming back here." Nate nods and looks towards Dipper on the floor.

"You freakin' out kid?" Nate asks, helping Dipper to his feet. Dipper shakes his head, then the  
"Uh, no, I'm cool," he plays seeing the monster off, "Everything's cool." Robbie scoffs and rolls his eyes, not believing Dipper at all.

"Then what's all this about?" Robbie asks, pointing to the spilled ice on the floor. Dipper looks down tot he ice on the floor, and gulps.

"That's, uhm.. hey look!" Dipper enthusiastically shouts away from the icebox, "Dancy Pants Revolution!" He hopes he's distracting them away from the embarrassing scare he received. "The game that tricks people into exercising!" he finishes lamely, chuckling nervously. The teens fall for his distraction, and begin to go towards the discarded game machine. "Heh heh, yeah let's all-" Dipper cuts off and glances back at the freezer, "Let's go play that." Dipper walks over to join the others as they finish hooking the game back up into the power supply.

"Dance!" the game announces as Thompson plays the game, everyone cheering him on, "Hurry up!" The other teens continue to cheer him on, as Dipper joins the others.

"Wow," Wendy says, turning to Dipper, "He's really terrible at this." Dipper nods, and happens to look past the gang of teens to take a glimpse of the outside world. Instead of normal reflections, except for Mabel it seemed, everyone's skeletons were exposed, replacing skin and muscle. Dipper rubs his eyes, and everything and everyone is back to normal.

"I'll be right back," Dipper states, gulping and running away from the group to head for the payphone at the back. Putting in a quarter, he manages to get the phone to ring. "Come on Grunkle Stan, pick up!" After a few minutes of fruitless ringing, he hangs up the phone and turns back to face Mabel. "Mabel?" he asks, as he approaches the technicolor girl, her pulsating aura not deadly, but very bright, "I need your advice." He sits next to his crazy sister, her light element not giving off any heat, but it was almost too uncomfortable to stand if he wasn't desperate. "We're hanging out in a haunted convenience store I can't get a hold of Grunkle Stan,and if I say anything about it to any of these guys they'll just think I', a scared little kid or something!"

The girl is comatose, save the gurgling, foaming sugar on her lips and the blank stare she was giving off. Dipper was actually concerned for his sister's well being now. "Mabel?" he asks again, wanting to shake her out of whatever was happening.

Inside Mabel's hallucination, brought on by the Smile Dip, she's flying through the air with the same crazy pop music playing in the background. "The future!" Mabel shouts to the air, "...is in the past!" Suddenly the view pans out to show a massive creature underneath her. "Onwards Aoshima!" she cries out as she rides a dolphin with massive biceps. It cries out, opening its mouth for another fist to come out of its maw, before opening all together and shooting rainbow beams from its palms.

Back in reality, Dipper is shaking Mabel, trying to snap her out of it, as she begins shooting out harmless, laser-like beams of light from her eyes and hands. "Mabel!" he says in distress, "How many of these did you eat!?" She's silent for a moment, but the beams of light finally cut it out as she begins to rouse.

"Beleven... teen..." she groans out, the foam from her mouth beginning to fizzle out.

"Oh man," Dipper says, dropping Mabel to the floor and panicking, "Oh man oh man oh man!" Suddenly Robbie cries out in triumph from behind the register, before dropping his quarter and going to pick it up.

"Whoa guys, you might wanna see this!" he states, coming back up from behind the register. Everyone except Mabel joins Robbie, and they see the markings of where Ma and Pa Duskerton bodies had died.

"Then the rumors are true!" Lee states in awe, while Dipper mere swallows painfully slowly. Robbie then pushes on Lee towards the outlines.

"Dude, I dare you to lie down in it!" Robbie says, Lee gulps and looks towards the others.

"G-good idea!" he replies, turning to Nate, "Go lie down in it!" Nate smirks and begins walking towards the marks.

"Oooh, look at me," Nate responds jokingly, drawing out his words trying to creep everybody out, "I'm a dead body, look!" He was about to lie down, when Dipper calls out.

"Wait!" Dipper says, blushing as everyone turns to look at him, "Maybe... let's not do that?"

"Aw, c'mon Captain Buzzkill!" Robbie taunts, "Afraid we can't handle a teeny weenie, little ghostie wostie?" He's switched to a babying voice, just enough to annoy Dipper into acting.

"I thought I was Dr. Funtimes?" Dipper states, before getting angry at Robbie, "Fine, if you want to tempt the fates, go ahead; this convenience store really is haunted though, so don't go crying to me..."

"Boo! Ah c'mon!" the various teens yell at Dipper.

"Status update: trapped in store with insane nine year old," Tambry states, much to Dippers offense.

"I'm not a nine year old!" Dipper states, lying down in the markings of Pa Duskerton's body, "I'm thirteen! Technically a teen!" Suddenly the store begins to rumble, and the lights go out, before the tape markings begin to glow with an eerie green glow.

Suddenly the Teens group up together, as they freak out because of the light show. Tambry is texting as the teens wait to see what is going on, before she suddenly begins losing control and disappears before Dipper's and the other teens eyes. Dipper walks over to Tambry's phone and picks it up.

"Status update:AAAAAUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHH!" Dipper reads from the phone, as it continues writing without its owner. The others suddenly hear banging coming from the security feed, and the group looks over to see Tambry on the screen, screaming as the Teens lay their eyes on her.

"AAAAUUUGGHHH!" everyone else screams out in response, before Wendy breaks away and heads for the video feed.

"Tambry!" she says, touching the screen, "Tambry, can you hear us?" Tambry looks around in confusion, as the view of the camera feed changes to show an empty store in the video store.

"What are we supposed to do?" Nate asks, panicking as he looks at the others, "Shouldn't she just be able to leave the circuit with her powers?"

"I don't know man!" Lee responds, "Her powers usually don't do stuff like that, she's just supposed to be a technopath." The other teens gather back up, and Robbie is the one who makes the first suggestion.

"Let's just go already!" Robbie cries out, afraid of whatever unearthly thing they unleashed.

"Thompson!" Wendy cries out, causing everyone to turn and look at the teen who is know dancing on the Dancy Pants Revolution! Game, "Can you use your power sharing and see if you can get Tambry out of there, maybe combine hers and Lee's powers?"

"Wait! I've almost got the high score!" Thompson says, before dissolving into data and reappearing in the game, "Uh, what?" Suddenly he's rained upon by arrows.

"It's time to shake what your mama gave you!" the game announces, as up, down, left, and right arrows rain down onto Thompson, as he crawls feebly into the fetal position to get out of the path of the sharp pixels.

"No!" he cries out, "So many arrows!"

"You're a dance machine!" the game announces, unaware of Thompson's plight.

"No,you're a dance machine!" Thompson calls back, "Can't... use.. my powers..." He keeps getting bombarded, and begins to break down and cry.

"Thompson!" Wendy calls out, "Oh man, oh man, he can't use his powers either..." She turns to the door and tries to open it. "Guys, the doors locked!" she states, as she turns back to the others.

"Forget them!" Robbie states, hefting the cash register in his hands, brushing past the others and heading for the door, "Outta my way!" He throws the heavy piece of equipment at the glass doors, only for the register to dissolve into green sparkles, before bouncing back and launching Robbie all the way back towards Mabel.

"Everybody, wait!" Dipper states, "Whatever's doing this, must have some kind of reason!" He pulls out Journal 3, and begins to flip through the pages. "Maybe if we can figure out what it is, they'll let us out of here!" he states. The teens looks skeptical for a moment, but Wendy speaks up.

"I don't know guys, maybe he's got a point!" she states, looking back towards the knocked out Robbie, and towards Thompson and Tambry's plight.

"Yeah right, I'm sure a ghost just wants to talk about his feelings!" Lee states sarcastically, before he screams out and disappears like the others and reappears elsewhere, "Wuh?" Looking around, he finds himself sitting on the edge of a cereal bowl and floating in milk. He tries to teleport back to the others using his powers, but then finds out he can't use his elemental power.

"I'm bonkers for eating you alive!" a giant toucan mascot says, as Lee looks up, holding a giant spoon.

"No!" Lee screams, as Dipper and Wendy merely wince and watch, unable to do anything.

"Lee!" Nate screams out, watching what happened to his friend, "Okay, okay... I'm with you kid! 100%, man!" Suddenly all three turn to the back, as boxes and things fall around where Mabel and Robbie were both undisturbed. The glowing around Robbie was quite disconcerting.

"Welcome!" Robbie states in a voice much deeper than normal, as he is lifted in the air his head and neck turn to an unnatural degree, before his body snaps back to normal and the floating teen is staring down at the with a fittingly malevolent smirk. Dipper, Nate, and Wendy all scream at the horrifying sight of the teen floating in midair.

"They got Robbie!" Wendy cries out.

"Welcome to your graves, young trespassers!" Robbie states, as he kicks his legs and laughs.

"We're super sorry for hanging out in your store!" Wendy says to the possessed Robbie.

"Yeah!" Dipper agrees, "Can we just go now and leave forever?" The possessed Robbie contemplates that for a moment,rubbing his chin in thought as he does so.

"Well... okay," Robbie states, smiling, "You're free to go." The doors open, letting in a fresh, cool, blast of air. "But before you leave, hot dogs are now half off," he raises his hands in a playful manner as he floats over to the turnstile oven, "I know it might be crazy, but you gotta try these dogs!" Nate screams and runs for the door, but it slams shut on him. "Just kidding about the hot dog sale!" he chuckles.

"Just let us out of here!" Nate calls out in fear, and Robbie looks at him crossly.

"I don't like your tone!" he states, staring down Nate as he dissolves into thin air, only to reappear on the turnstile oven.

"No!" Nate cries out from the oven, "I'M A HOT DOG!"

"It begins!" the possessed Robbie states, causing everything in the room to float, "Welcome to your home for all eternity!" The items begin to float to the ceiling, as Wendy and Dipper both watch.

"Dipper, what do we do?" she asks the Journal wielding twin.

"DUCK!" Dipper states, as they both duck to narrowly avoid a flying shelf, "In there!" He points to the tipped over ice machine, both teen and twin manage to get inside the empty shelves.

"What do they want from us?!" Wendy asks Dipper. He shrugs, as he begins looking through the Journal.

"Revenge?" Dipper, "I guess?" Wendy barely looks out the door at the malevolent, laughing form of the possessed Robbie.

"What did we do wrong?" Wendy asks. This causes Dipper to get an idea.

"Okay, let's figure out the pattern here," he states, "Why was each person taken?" He lifts up his fingers and begins to count down. "Tambry was texting, Thompson was playing a video game, Lee was being sarcastic," he counts down, "It doesn't make any sense!"

"Yeah!" Wendy nods, "I mean, those are al just normal teenage things." Dipper stops and looks at Wendy.

"Wendy, say that last part again!" Dipper states excitedly.

"Normal teenage things?" Wendy responds.

"Of course!" he says, smacking his forehead, "Stay here until I get back!"

"Wait Dipper, don't be a hero!" Wendy calls out, "You know your power doesn't work without any forest around!" As he crawls out of the freezer, he ignores the protest of Wendy, and goes to face the possessed Robbie in the middle of the vortex of flying furniture.

"Hey ghost!" Dipper calls out. Robbie's head twists around to face Dipper, then turns the rest of his body towards him. "I've got something to tell you!" Dipper states boldly, as Robbie gets closer, "I'm... not a... teenager!" Suddenly the vortex of stuff falls to the floor, and a fist appears to be holding up Robbie by the hood of his jacket.

"Well, why didn't you say so?" the glowing, floating body of Pa Duskerton states, dropping Robbie into pile of candy that's right next to the comatose Mabel.

"Uhhhh..." Robbie groans, trying to get up, only to fall back into the pile of plastic bags of expired candy.

"How old did you say you were?" Pa asks Dipper, who reluctantly looks at his shoes.

"I'm... I'm twelve, technically not a teen," Dipper states, "The same as my twin sister..." Pa floats down and stands in front of Dipper.

"When I was still alive, teenagers were a scourge on our store!" Pa states, as he puts his hand out towards Dipper, passing a ghostly hand through Dipper's skull, "Always sassafrassin' customers with their boomy boxes and disrespectful short pants!" As he speaks, Dipper actually sees Pa's memories, of he and Ma watching as three teenagers in 90's clothes and horribly clashing shades stood outside their store with loud music playing, horribly grating his own ears. "My darlin' wife, she was diagnosed with hyperacusia, which caused her to sensitive to her own element, sound," Pa says, "We up and banned them disrespectful teens." In the memory, Dipper watches as Pa puts up a sign saying 'NO TEENS', only for the Teens to come back with louder boom boxes and worse music. "But they retaliated with this new fangled rap music," Pa states, "The lyrics, they were so hateful, they gave my poor dear a fright."

In the memory the teens are sitting on the sidewalk, and staring cruelly at Ma and Pa, as they watch. "Homework's whack, and so are rules!" The boombox screams out, "Tuckin' in your shirt's for fools!" Suddenly Ma Duskerton clutches her chest in agony, as does Pa.

"We were stricken down with double heart attacks, right there and then," Pa states, "That's why we hate teenagers so much! Don't we honey?" Pa Duskerton removes his hand from Dipper's skull and moves back towards the spot he had been floating above. He then nuzzles empty air, and Dipper realizes that the ghost had been referring to both himself and his wife. Except his wife obviously wasn't a ghost, because she was a sound elemental, not an ecto elemental...

"Uh, I don't mean to pry, but who are you talking to?" Dipper asks, "You know that Ma's dead right?" He quickly covers his mouth, as he realizes that was the wrong thing to say.

"What did you say?" Pa asks, coming alight with fire and growing to grotesquely monstrous proportions, "Of course my darlin' puddin' pop is still alive, she's... she's right..." He looks around confused, before reverting back to his normal form. "Ma?" he calls out, "Ma... where did you go?" Suddenly he turns to Dipper, and slowly begins to regain his monstrous appearance. "What.. did you do?" he asks, his teeth sharpening and growing into long fangs, "TO MA?" Dipper backs away, and as he does so, he stumbles on some ceiling tile and falls backwards onto some moss and rotting tiles. He looks down at where his hands landed, and he looks back up at Pa.

"Pa, I'm- I'm sorry, but Ma isn't here, and you're not a ghost!" Dipper calls out, "I- I don't think you're dead, dead, I think you're a Nether elemental, I think you can manifest ectoplasm, its why you're still alive!"

"WHERE'S MA?" he thunders, ignoring Dipper's explanation, "WHY ISN'T MA HERE?" Dipper grips tightly into the moss and pleads he is right.

"Ma... is gone, she's not a Nether like you, she's gone, but you're still here!" Dipper states, "The Elemental Social Services, the Astral Commission, they can help you, you can move on and join Ma!" He squeezes and stares directly into Pa's flaming eyes. "But right now, you need to calm down, you need to let us go, and we can get you help," Dipper states, "Please!" Pa pauses for a moment, but then continues to crouch closer to Dipper, baring his fangs and about to come down in one massive bite. "Fine, you give me no choice Pa Duskerton," Dipper states, which causes Pa to stop and blink, "You know the best thing about moss and mushrooms, they like to grow in the strangest of places, in old leaking buildings with no moisture control especially." He smiles and digs down deeper.

"It's a good thing I'm a nature elemental," Dipper states, "You get to learn about the coolest plants and animals and their unique abilities." Suddenly he pulls out a chunk of moldy ceiling tile from the ceiling and throws it in Pa's face. The small board suddenly sprouts vines that wrap around the ghost of Pa, defying biology, but doing exactly what Dipper wanted. "You know there's actually a unique fungus, from an area in the Chernobyl disaster zone, that eats radiation?" he smirks, looking towards the enraged phantom, "Thankfully it isn't that hard to replicate with my powers, and ectoplasm is just another form of radiation... so the principles weren't that hard to apply with a touch of mana added in the right place..." Dipper goes to walk back towards Wendy, while Pa struggles in his bonds.

Suddenly the smell of burning sulphur and ash begins to fill the room, as Dipper turns back to see Pa Duskerton in flames and breaking free of his fungal trap. "Crud, crud, crud, crud!" Dipper yells, running and tripping before he can hide in the ice machine with Wendy, "Ah fudge!" Wendy goes to open the door and pull Dipper inside, but Pa is suddenly ripping Dipper free from her hands, and kicking the ice machine away.

"You've done it now, boy," he says in a low, guttural voice, "I think I'll allow one child to join my list of hated teenagers!" Dipper closes his eyes and awaits the end, when suddenly he feels himself basking in the brightest, most soothing light he had ever felt. He feels himself falling to the ceiling, and opening his eyes to see Pa Duskerton's flames quickly extinguishing under the brightest, whitest, most pure light Dipper had ever seen. He then notices the light is emanating from his own twin sister, surrounded by the empty, floating packages of Smile Dip around her.

"Be at peace, Pa Duskerton," Mabel says in high pitched voice, her hair floating around her like she was in zero gravity, a halo of light framing her, "Let your anger go, and begone these foul enchantments that blind you to the truth..." With a wave of her hand, the pure white light washes over Pa and the whole store, causing Pa to collapse to the ceiling on his knees, as green energy ebbs out of him like a lit sparkler. Suddenly he explodes in a rainbow of colors, and everything goes white. When Dipper opens his eyes, Pa is gone, and Mabel is falling up.

"Well, I don't think you have to worry about us coming back!" Dipper states, as gravity starts returning to normal, and he finds himself shortly on the floor. Looking around, he notices all the other teens are now freed, and Pa is nowhere to be found. He quickly gets up and runs over too Mabel, who has landed in a pile of Smile Dip packets, some open, some not. "Mabel! Mabel, are you okay?" Dipper asks, shaking his currently unconscious twin, "I don't know what you did, I don't know what that was, but we're going to figure this out together..." Suddenly he looks up, hearing Wendy cheering his name.

"Guys, guys you won't believe it!" Wendy says laughing, "The ghosts appeared, and Dipper..." She stops when she meets Dipper's pleading eyes, and she feels a bit uncomfortable. "Uh, and uh, Dipper just grabbed a bat, and just started beating ghosts down," she says miming the motion with her hands in fists, "Left and right, and the ghost got all scared, and ran away like a couple of little girls, it was insane!"

"Alright Dr. Funtimes!" Nate announces, as the other teens cheer out for Dipper. Wendy turns to Dipper from the back of the group and zips her lips. Dipper smiles then mimics her motion, satisfied she wasn't going to tell the others about whatever weird thing just happened to Mabel. Speaking of Mabel...

"Ugh... I'm never gonna eat or do anything ever again..." she groans, waking up in Dipper's arms, blinking up groggily from the Smile Dip and the strange powers she had exhibited. Dipper holds up a half eaten package of Smile Dip and shakes it in front of her face, just to test her.

"Hey," he says, "There's still some left..." Suddenly Mabel is a bit more aware, and slaps the candy package from his hands.

"Evil!" she announces, while Dipper merely chuckles.

* * *

By the time they got out to the car and back to the Shack, Mabel was half asleep from staying out all night, and Dipper was quite sure Grunkle Stan wasn't even aware they hadn't made it home. Wendy had placed Mabel on a chair in the front lawn, while she and Dipper talked real quick. "Well, I'm probably scared for life," Wendy says, as she looks back at the van of half asleep Teens. Dipper nods, and scratches the back of his head.

"Yeah, that was pretty crazy," Dipper says back, "Listen, about Mabel..." Wendy holds up her hands and faces Dipper straight on.

"Don't even start, I think I'll go stare at a wall for a while and RETHINK EVERYTHING," she says to him simply, "Hey, next time we hang out, let's stay at the Mystery Shack. Okay?" She brings up a fist for a fistbump.

Dipper looks at her excitedly and completes the action, smiling widely. "N-next time?" he says stuttering in happiness, Yeah! Let's hang... at the Shack... next time!" Wendy nods and goes back to the van of teens, and after a while he loses sight of them. Blushing heavily and pumped full of excitement for actually being invited to spend more time with Wendy, he barely manages to open the door to the Mystery Shack, just as the television set comes through the window. Grunkle Stan looks out the window at Mabel and Dipper.

"Uh, couldn't find..." he looks to the TV and back to Dipper, narrowing his eyes as he does so, "Couldn't find the remote.."

* * *

Dipper watches as the memories, the experience of that other world fades, and he comes back to reality. He turns to the Axolotl, and looks at him excitedly. "What was THAT?" he asks, "Does everyone have superpowers in that reality, or is it just local to Gravity Falls?" The Axolotl thrums in amusement, a deep throaty laugh that shook the timeless cosmos around Dipper.

"This is a very unique reality, one of a kind you might say, in its own way," the Axolotl states, "This reality is perhaps one of the more radical versions of your universe, one that also is fret with more danger as a result." The Axolotl forms a map of the Multiverse in the form of a lattice, with Gravity Falls at its center, and the various worlds Dipper had already seen marked or lit up in various places. The furthest one out, the one he had just seen, sparkled a deep, shimmering black. "This version of Gravity Falls falls within the top five realities closest to the forbidden world, the unrealized reality," Axolotl points with his tongue to this reality, a few spaces away and a very unpleasant yellow color, separated by running lines of black, "The sole reality in which Bill Cipher not only won, he is all that he now pretends to be, blinding even my sight to that world's state of balance."

"Is he the reason you brought me here?" Dipper asks, "You said I am a tuning fork, a way to test the balance, but you never really told me exactly why you stole me out of my reality, Axolotl?" The great cosmic beast laughs once more, closing and opening its eyes again.

"There is a world whose version of Bill Cipher has grown beyond all catalogued possibilities, and it is infecting world after world with weirdness and oddities, and only growing stronger as it moves," the Axolotl states, "From Weirdmeggedon to the Oddpocalypse, from Normageddon, to the Final Showdowns, the rogue Cipher is collecting its alternate selves and depositing them... somewhere..." The Axolotl closes its eyes in contemplation.

"If one Bill Cipher in the physical world could control all of time and space, if he could break free of Gravity Falls magnetic weirdness..." Dipper's face becomes one of horror, "If he breaks through realities to collect his alternate selves... what if he's not just hiding them somewhere... what if he's preparing for something else, like wanting to become the only Bill Cipher among a multiverse of Ciphers?" The Axolotl opens its massive eyes and stares at Dipper. "Bill Cipher 'freed' his reality because it thought too two dimensionally," Dipper mutters to himself, "What if he's doing the same to his other 'selves' because they fell to the same tricks and traps all Bill Cipher's do?" The Axolotl emit something Dipper could only explain as a growl, before flaring his mighty crest, causing colors and stars to flare to life on and around it.

"Then the balance of the entire multiverse is in danger," the Axolotl states, "And that means more than just Cipher's will be affected soon enough..." Dipper looks to the map of the multiverse, still in his view, and he begins to look closer at the individual patterns and colors. He notices one is an empty black, and the ones around it are slowly starting to be consumed by cracks, strands of the same empty blackness. Dipper hoped he could find out whoever was doing this, before the multiverse itself unwound.

* * *

 _D/N: Wkh odwwlfh fudfnv, wkh Flskhu volsv wkurxjk, wkh Darorwo wdonv vpdfn, dqg wklv Dwedvk flskhu lv qhz._

 ** _?/N: Lmdziwh Zlhsrnz, gl nb mvcg kozbgsrmth!_**


End file.
